Do you think it's possible, after more than a decade of crossdressing, and at least 5 years of thinking about transitioning genders, that I can be engaged to a woman who in no way, shape, or form is ok with me crossdressing? She knows it's been a part of my life, but she loves me as a guy and just thinks that men shouldn't wear women's clothes. It's still something I think about, something that interests me, but from this standpoint it doesn't seem like is going to be something that can be a part of my life anymore.
I don't think it's a good idea. I was married for 18 years to a man who suppressed his homosexuality until the last six months of our marriage. And when he told me, I didn't leave, I didn't kick him out, I didn't not accept him. I actually asked him what he needed and what we could do to work things out. But he didn't come to me first - he had started another relationship, so obviously we couldn't work things out. Marriage is about compromise, but shouldn't mean sacrificing yourself. If you can't come to a meeting of the minds on this, what should really be a non-issue, how will you compromise in the future on the really important things? Honestly, though, you're the only one who can determine if this is something you can give up on. Best of luck, with whatever you decide.
