I'm only out to two people, and I'm still in the questioning phase, though I'm pretty confident that I'm not straight. My sister and I are living together for the summer and I asked her why she was attracted to men vs. women. (I've been asking a lot of people to compare to my experiences.) After she replied, she added that if I was questioning - not something I'd said - then I probably wasn't gay because she'd talked to her gay friends and they'd said that people know from the get go their sexuality. I posted about this in the sexual orientation section, and a lot of people disagreed with her and her friends. (I actually didn't know that she had any/many gay friends.) I don't know why, but it hurt when she said that. I haven't come out to her at all, I felt like she was rejecting my feelings. I don't get it. Any thoughts?
Well, some people might know from the get go but there's a big difference between knowing and accepting. There's a lot of denial that happens which typically leads to questioning. Most of us were raised in a way that made us assume we were straight. As we develop and hit puberty it comes as a shock for those who aren't straight. Thoughts of "That can't be right." And "I'm not gay!" are very normal. But not everyone realizes when they're young. Some figure it out later in life.
A lot of people don't know right away. Some people don't even realize until they're sixty years old or older! You can realize at any time. It varies a lot from person to person. ^^
