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First Lesbian 'Relationship'. Please help!

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by HopelessHeart, Jul 2, 2016.

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  1. HopelessHeart

    HopelessHeart
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    Alright, so... I'm very late in the game here. I am 25, and only now acknowledging that I am attracted to women. I have never had a boyfriend before, and I just starting seeing a girl for the first time!

    We have been texting every day for the last three weeks or so, and we've met up twice. It hasn't been very long, I know, but I think she is incredible in every single way, and it really seems like we have a good connection. I think my heart melts every time we kiss, I can hardly think about anything else. I have never experienced anything like this - I am so afraid that my inexperience and insecurities will ruin things.

    I want her to know that I am definitely still interested in seeing her more, but I also don't want to come off too desperate or clingy. I just can't stop thinking about her. I don't know how to express my feelings properly, especially since it is so early on and I don't want to freak her out (even though she seems like the type that wouldn't). Is it too soon to let her know I have been developing these feelings? To let her know that she is almost always on my mind?

    I'm totally smitten by this girl and I don't know what to do!! Please any advice would be so appreciated.
     
    #1 HopelessHeart, Jul 2, 2016
  2. bubbles123

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    Well I can't claim to have tons of relationship experience myself, but as for inexperience, just be honest. It's okay that you haven't had much experience before, and I'm sure she'd be helpful and understanding. If you guys are going to do something physical for example and you're unsure about certain things or want to go slow, or want to only try certain things, then tell her. In my experience, it starts to just feel natural if you just start going for it and trying things out.

    I'll save the communicating feelings part for someone else to answer because I'm not very experienced there. But good luck!!<3
     
    #2 bubbles123, Jul 2, 2016
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2016
  3. HopelessHeart

    HopelessHeart
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    Thanks bubbles! She knows I have never been intimate or had a relationship before, and is very understanding of that aspect :slight_smile:

    As for inexperience I suppose I was more referring to my actions, maybe just if I do or say things too soon, for example.
     
    #3 HopelessHeart, Jul 2, 2016
  4. HappyGirlLucky

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    I would say it is too early to say too much if you have only actually met up twice, but then again it really depends on how she acts too. Still, taking it slow is almost never a bad idea. I am actually being a total hypocrite saying that because I would have moved in with her and adopted 5 cats already, but taking it slow is almost always an objectively better idea.

    So what exactly do you want to say to her? That you want to date exclusively? That you think about her a lot? That would be totally OK (in my U-haul opinion at least, but you might want to get a second opinion on that)... I would definitely not drop the l word just yet at least.
     
    #4 HappyGirlLucky, Jul 2, 2016
  5. HopelessHeart

    HopelessHeart
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    Oh definitely not the 'L' word! I'd just like her to know that I think about her a lot and want to keep getting to know her. Just to see what she might be thinking as well.

    I guess I just didn't think I would start to catch feelings so quickly, it's a bit nerve-wracking to be honest :icon_redf
     
    #5 HopelessHeart, Jul 2, 2016
  6. HappyGirlLucky

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    If she comes across as if she probably thinks about you a lot too it would probably be fine. :slight_smile: Does she initiate conversations about as often as you do for example?

    I catch feelings way too quickly too and can't hide them or do anything about it haha! :lol:
     
    #6 HappyGirlLucky, Jul 2, 2016
  7. HopelessHeart

    HopelessHeart
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    In the beginning it was pretty even split who would start the texting first - I'll admit that now I initiate a bit more, but she's always responsive.

    I think she's just as interested, but I really just don't know. And that's driving me crazy!
     
    #7 HopelessHeart, Jul 2, 2016
  8. love23cali

    love23cali
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    I think we all tend to fall hard sooner than those of other orientations, perhaps because relationships are a little more difficult for us to find.

    I think you can text things like "I want to see you again" or "I miss you :frowning2:"..."I love when you kiss me..." but nothing really beyond that quite yet.
     
    #8 love23cali, Jul 2, 2016
  9. Houdini

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    Hey HopelessHeart,
    I am kind of in the same situation. Just started to date a girl for the first time and I'm also totally smitten by her :wink:
    Though I am not sure if she is still really as interested in me as I am in her I have no idea what to do. I would really like to tell her/show her that I really like her but I don't want to scare her away by being too desperate. Also I am really shy.
    I don't like to wait around but I guess that is what I am doing. Waiting for our next date and see what happens from there...
     
    #9 Houdini, Jul 3, 2016
  10. n3ko

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    tell her!
     
    #10 n3ko, Jul 3, 2016
  11. HopelessHeart

    HopelessHeart
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    I told her!

    I can't wait to see her again :help:

    ---------- Post added 3rd Jul 2016 at 07:39 PM ----------
    This is exactly how I am! It turns out I really love being affectionate. Who knew :lol:
     
    #11 HopelessHeart, Jul 3, 2016
  12. Houdini

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    good for you :slight_smile:
    how did she react?
     
    #12 Houdini, Jul 5, 2016
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