I have recently come out as lesbian to some close family members. Turns out I should not have worried, because they said they had known for years. Weirdly, the only thing people have an issue with is what I look like. I have very short hair, and nearly all of my clothes are androgenous, or just plain masculine. I love the way I look. It just fits my personality. I'm the type of girl who gets dirty. I fix things in the house that break. I can sucessfully wrestle an alpaca to the ground and cut it's toenails (if you have never done that, take my word that it is not easy). If I can't climb a tree in it, I don't wanna wear it. The problem is, when someone dresses me up as a girl, I look really pretty. I am very slim, with a face that looks like a 12 year old girl in an anime, and dimples. When my family see me in a tight dress, heels and make up, they say "see thats what you are supposed to look like!! Why can't you see how beautiful you really are??" When all I wanna do is have four showers until all of the make up is gone, then burn the stupid shoes. According to some of my family, I need to decide if I am "one of those transgenders who want surgery" or "a normal girl". They do not understand that I still want to be a girl, (because hey, girls are great) but being pretty and stared at makes me feel sick. Any other beautiful women in beanies and hoodies out there?? Or handsome guys in pretty things? Please tell me i'm not that weird?
I CAN DEFINITELY RELATE TO THIS!! i just love myself when i'm makeup free and just have a bun and just wear just a t shirt..i feel completely crap when i have to wear a dress or put makeup on i feel so ugly and uncomfortable..that's because we are NOT this.. and my mother and friends say things to me like " why don't you want to look beautiful?" "dress like a woman"! (i think androgynous women are the hottest) you just want to be yourself..there is nothing wrong with that.. please don't change for anybody you're amazing!
You could move to Idaho or Wyoming, as you pretty much described 90% of the straight women I know. I can think of five off the top of my head that can rebuild engines, one owns a race car and another sells Avon all week and goes mudding in her old 4x4 Bronco on the weekend. Probably a dozen go hunting and I know one who wore a camouflage dress to her wedding. Its a pretty big world, be who you want to be.
Oh my gosh, there are LOTS of pretty girls in beanies and hoodies. Jenny Shimizu in her modeling prime was like WOW beautiful and she dressed very masculine and had buzzed hair. Also, I get the thing with your family. My family is like that towards the cisgender women in it. There's an expectation for "normal" to equal "super feminine" for females and "normal" to equal "super masculine" for males, with zero ground in towards the middle!
I don't know if I would call myself pretty, but I guess I look OK. I wear pretty much only hoodies when it's colder, graphic t-shirts in the summer and beanies and snapbacks. I would call myself a tomboy but I do wear eyeliner and mascara quite often and don't particularly like getting dirty, I also have long hair (always pulled back into a ponytail) so I don't exactly fit the bill of what you are looking for, but blood is going to spill before you get me into a tight dress or anything frilly. I absolutely loathe formal events like weddings and stuff where I am supposed to wear such things. Also butch/tomboy/androgynous girls are the best, don't let your family tell you otherwise!
Nah, you're not weird at all I go through phases personally. Some days are just cargo pants, a t-shirt with a WW1 fighter plane and hiking boots because, sod it. Others I really dig putting on a cute dress and some make up - heels are always anathema. Regardless though, it's your choice how you want to dress and what makes you feel good about yourself. Everyone else can fong off.
I can relate! Even at 33, I still get comments implying that I'd be so much cuter if I dressed more "girly" (I'm not even particularly butch, just a bit more androgynous than the average woman). I get the feeling that a few of my friends view me as a project, and that if they could get me into a dress and heels then I'd finally reach my full potential of attractiveness. The world is still very heterocentric and into gender norms. I've started to speak up more - I've told friends that I don't share their limited view of how a woman is supposed to look and that to me, presenting as androgynous is what makes me feel most confident and attractive. Tell your family how offensive their comments are. Even if you can't get them to like how you present, they should hopefully be able to understand that making negative comments is hurtful.
That comment of your family "one of those transgenders who want surgery or a normal girl" was offensive towards lesbian and transgender community (sometimes it's hurtful to read that society blame us for not being normal, at least for me it was hurtful to read). Well too many girls struggle with gender expressions and beauty standards, cause you can never fill the expectations that society puts on you, and if you try to do it you're on the wrong way, by not enjoying and not living your life anymore. So just be yourself, if you have to wear formal clothes, just use a dress and not to much make up, you're free to do whatever you want. Remember be yourself and enjoy life in your own way.
I relate so much to this. I like looking natural and "plain" I guess, because that's how I feel comfortable. It doesn't mean I'm not a woman. And I also like more natural women, not a huge fan of artificial stuff (like heavy makeup) on women. I'm not saying It's bad to use this stuff, It's just not my preference. Personally, I think society's gender roles are a load of shit. Why do women have to go through all this crap to look beautiful while men can look like "trash" and still be handsome/fine? I know so many men that keep the ugliest, messiest beards ever and no one bats an eye. It's garbage.
