What am I looking for in this person?

I know this is one more of those "you are the only one who can answer" questions, but I sincerely need a place to vent.

I'm thought I was not fond of casual encounters. By "encounters" I don't necessarily mean sex or sleeping with a guy.

So, back to the point, I was wrong about it. I found out I do like casual encounters and that what I don't like are those casual encounters marked by an essential superficiality. I enjoy being "free", I enjoy liking people, trying out new stuff. But at the same time, I can't enjoy myself if I'm not caring about that person.

In one encounter in particular, marked more by superficiality than I'm used to, I clearly displayed sentimentality, in a physical way, like feeling hands, caressing his face. It was fun, because I felt the guy was genuinely kind of scared by it, perhaps he thought I was falling in love with him (I was, a bit, but nothing extremely out of ordinary). Although he backed away a bit, he started enjoying it. We had fun, and that was it. It ended, we threw each other away like if were nothing. That bothered me, a lot.

I'm just confused, you know, about the current state of sexual and emotional human
relations in our western society. Today we don't cherish profound love declarations, what we cherish, on my view, is freedom above all, individuality above all. And if you will come across someone who values individuality above all, that person is me. But still, I'm confused about it.

I've been talking to a really nice guy, he is sweet, he doesn't seem to display the possessiveness of some past relationship experiences. But I can't find, inside myself, any wishes to pursue anything further, perhaps I'm scared of sacrificing my perpetual and universal personal freedom, I don't want to let it go. So, what do I want with him? Because right now I'm just going with the flow, I'm not pursuing anything in particular, but I can't help but wonder; what am I looking for ? Am I looking for a casual encounter marked by less superficiality ? Then I'll just thrown that person away ? Will I keep having encounters with other guys, as much as I want, regardless of being in touch with this guy in particular? If this guy ends up in love with me, and I break his heart, I will feel genuinely bothered and disappointed with myself. I feel he already is. But I don't feel I am. I just care about people, you know, in a universal level. I care about people, and thats it, no more, no less. Even when I was dating, I didn't "love" my boyfriend, I just cared about him. And I still don't feel any changes, so, perhaps, thats who I am and how I am.

Is this wrong? Is this how it should be?

I genuinely don't know how to feel about this.