Can anyone explain why this is how I was treated for my "disappearance"?

Honestly, I am just really baffled with what you've shared thus far of your story and my mind is just spinning right now. However, this part of your story is really what I wanted to comment on:


A lot of complications have happened involving me, because I'm gay; basically, there's this one guy in the group, and before I came out, he would be extremely flirty with me to the point where everyone would make comments and discuss us 24/7.


When I came out to him he said everything was a joke and basically set me up in a situation so I could be blamed for everything wrong in his life. He made me look crazy and turned everyone against me and I had no idea he was talking so much ****, I just knew everyone was awkward around me for a while.


After lots of paranoia and anxiety and crying I finally started approaching people, defending myself.


It got to the point where this guy was banned from my house. But our friends forced us to have a talk. During this talk the guy wasn't genuine or honest at all. One of my friends (who is his best friend, let's call him C) got pissed at me for not forgiving him, and basically I know he's been flip-floppy between us, has talked **** about me, hid things from me, etc.


Along with that, once I started coming out, one of my friends, who is homophobic, started being really rude to me, telling me that I don't know myself, etc.

In my opinion, this alone would make me not want to be bothered with NO ONE in your group at all!!! and as a matter of fact, if you were already aware that this group of people were homophobic, then ...just me speaking on my behalf...I would not had responded to his flirting. I know there are guys like that who are in the closet or just plain deceitful and if they have just an inkling that you may be gay, they will flirt with you to no end just to get you to give in to their advances and then...BOOM!!! ...I just Busted YOU!!!....I'm not GAY...I just did all of that just to see what you would do...

This to me seems like something this guy did to you which is a very crude thing to do to someone especially if they claim to be your friend. In regard to the others, I am not surprised that they responded this way by being homophobic and of course they are going to take up for your friend especially if he has been talking a lot of s**t about you behind your back.

To share a little story of my own with you just so that you can understand why I am saying what I am saying to you. There was this guy (Brandon) who was a very close friend with one of my favorite straight cousins. He was very handsome and an all-star, popular athlete. He and I became pretty cool since I was 12 years old. The older he got, the more handsome he got as well. Once he found out that I was gay, it seemed that he wanted to get closer to me because I believe that he felt why I was not making passes at him??? Do I not find him attractive??...you know...a lot of straight guys come off like this especially if you have a friendship with them and you come out to them and more than likely, some of them are going to ask those questions.

Anyway, we had all went out for my cousin's birthday one year and the night was a lot of fun to say the least. What kind of caught me off guard was when Brandon approached me in private and ask me if he could spend the night at my place because he was a little tipsy and tired and did not want to drive all the way home. I told him okay..no problem. When the night was coming to an end...Brandon went on and told my cousin that he was staying at my place instead of driving home which made my cousin give this weird look because he may have been wondering why he did not stay with him?? Once we arrived at my place, we chatted a little before retiring. I had a pull out couch in my extra room and told Brandon when he was ready to go to bed, everything was prepared for him.

Brandon went into the bathroom to change and I went into my bedroom and pulled up my door. All of a sudden, I heard this knock at my door and when I said come in..there was Brandon standing there in nothing but some really skimpy bikini briefs. Without a shadow of a doubt, he was looking really hot, but like I said ....if you are straight, I respect you to the fullest and do not make moves on you unless they are initiated by the straight person and I have a huge attraction for them.

So, he began this stupid chat with me which resulted in him taking off his briefs and standing butt naked before me. He began to ask me if I liked what I was seeing and then he approached me and took my hands and ask me to run my hands over his body. With this request, he began to get fully erect and started breathing hard and lightly moaning. He started talking dirty talk to me and then he straddled me on the bed and began kissing me. All of a sudden, my instincts kicked in and told me to stop this right now which I did. I told him this was not a good idea and to go to bed and get some rest. He kept trying to kiss me and taking my hand to put on his erect penis. I pulled my hand back and move my body and told him ...go to bed...this is not going to happen. He was very stunned and I can tell that he was a little annoyed that I did not join in his little game. After some persistence, he finally gave up and went to bed. However, the next morning, he had gotten up early and caught a cab to my cousin's place to get his car. He did not even stay for breakfast or say goodbye.

Later that afternoon, I receive a phone call from my cousin and his sister saying that Brandon told them that I came on to him and he was so disappointed that he locked the door to the room in order to keep me away from him until morning which was a bold face lie. He also told them that he did flirt a little with me by doing a little striptease but he was just joking and playing around just to see what I was going to do. After I revealed to them what really happened...unfortunately, none of them believed my story but believed him. I've never lied to them and I was really hurt that they chose to believe him over me. Needless to say, this caused a huge problem with our relationship and I decided to keep my distance as well cut all ties with them and him altogether because he had tried calling me several times to talk.

A couple of years later, my cousin contacted via email to inform me that he wanted to apologize for not believing me and he found out that Brandon had lied on me and everything I said was true. He caught Brandon in bed with another guy when he went to pay him a visit. They had the tendency to come by each others' places without giving proper notification he was coming by and he caught him in the act. However, I forgave him but it was not for him, it was for me. Our friendship has and still never the same. When I see either one of them, I am cordial, but I still keep my distance. In other words, I am not a fan of DRAMA and fictitious GOSSIP that is not true and it is more effective when its coming from family as opposed to outsiders.

With all of that being said...again...just my opinion...I would just lay low and separate myself from the equation altogether. I would not go out of my way to justify myself to them because no matter what you say to them, there minds are already made up about you and this is partially due to this guy running his mouth about you behind your back to them. And again...because they are all homophobic...you really do not have a leg to stand on so to speak. Therefore, I would just walk away and move on with my life because Karma Is A Bitch!!! and what's in the dark will soon come out into the light...