First of all, let me introduce the characters for my story (which will have different names): Tyler, kind of my ex, but I was almost sure he is straight; Peter, as I've mentioned in a previous thread ("Straight" best-friend drama); Riley, my best friend; Megan, who might be my ex's actual girlfriend; Nick, my ex's best friend. I know this may seem childish but this way I can get into the story, and you too. Tyler, 2 years ago, we had something like a relationship, which sadly lasted just a month. He waited for me (since we are not in the same section but in the same grade) so we could walk together for a while at the end of the day at school. He wrote me letters which one friend thought were the most romantic and sweet ever. He told me I was the love of his life and stuff like that so many times. He defended me whenever he was near. He made excuses to show up in my classroom's door and smile at me. He made me feel something for a boy I'd never felt before, and that's how I figured out I wasn't straight. Thanks to him, let's give him that. You have to understand that this was really intense for me because it was like my first real love, since know that I look back, and those girls I've had a crush on, it just wasn't me. One more thing, lots of people said we were a great couple and now that I look back, we could be perfect together except for the fact that he is straight and I'm not. However, when we broke up, because I felt he just wasn't into it anymore, he said everything was like a game to him, he told some girls I meant nothing to him (in contrast to all the times he swore I meant everything to him and that he wouldn't be able to live without me). And he swore he was straight. These things broke my heart. Peter, after what you could call my first love, I thought I was falling for this guy, but he just happened to be a total idiot. He became one of my best friends and then I thought that the could be gay, but as I stated before, he was just an idiot, and don't think I'm calling him this because he didn't like me back, it's way more complicated than that. However, everything's cool between us now. Riley, she's the only person I trust with everything, so she's the only one I'm out to. It took me like a year and a half to forget completely about Tyler (or at least that's what I thought at the moment), but when that happen I started to develop a crush on someone else (Peter). When my crush for Peter ended, I slowly figured out I hadn't completely gotten over Tyler, which hit me because I knew it was the worst thing I could do, fall for a straight guy, again. Whenever he smiled at me, or maybe just talked to me, I felt weird. But then I remembered that 1) he assured he was straight, 2) he might have a girlfriend, 3) I couldn't fall for him again. At the beginning of this week, Riley heard something she just told me yesterday: that Megan was deeply in love with Tyler for 4 years now but he didn't like her back. These things were said by Nick (Tyler's best friend) and Megan herself, so I believed it. I didn't know if I had to be happy because Tyler didn't have a girlfriend but I was, even though I was aware that he is straight. Today, I wanted to confirm the information with Nick, because I knew eventually he'd admit something, and he did. Since Megan is his ex, I asked him why doesn't he ask her out or something, and he told me that she's taken but he couldn't tell me by who. Then, I told him that Megan's boyfriend is his best friend and he confirmed it, so I realized what I had just heard: Tyler has a girlfriend. I couldn't show my surprise in front of my whole school so I just went to Riley and told her while I held back my tears, those which I hated because I couldn't understand why I still care about Tyler. Today, I felt as heartbroken as I felt the times he said I never meant something to him, that's why I'm writing this post, because its been a long time since he last broke my heart and I hope I can get past this quickly. The good thing I've seen in all of this is that I'm not inmature as before because I don't hate Megan or Tyler, it's not their fault they love each other and they don't even know how I feel, but I am a little mad at myself for still caring about him. Thanks for reading this far and hope you share your thoughts.
