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I am contemplating ending the friendship

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by dopplershift94, Sep 20, 2016.

  1. dopplershift94

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    A couple weeks ago, I wrote about a friend who was mad at me because I won't have sex with him.

    Some of you told me to end the friendship, and I decided that I wanted to still give it a chance.

    Like I said, a year ago he told me that he had a crush on me, and I didn't feel the same way. This semester, he's been non-stop bugging me about it. He is constantly telling me that he's depressed, and I tell him that he should get help.

    He still tries to convince me to have sex with him, but it hasn't happened as often. But every weekend, he gets drunk and then drunks text me saying things like "I hate you", "I'm mad at you.", etc. And then the next morning, he apologizes and tells me that he was drunk.

    I try to be nice, and I try to be helpful when he is feeling down, but he always gets mad when I tell him that he needs to get professional help or let time heal everything.

    On top of that, he is demanding of my time. He's been super pissed that I've been going out with other friends, and that last weekend, I only hung out with him once. I told him that I was busy this weekend, and he insists that I broke a promise to him, and that I owe it to him to hangout with him.

    I don't even tell him that I'm hanging out with the guy I like because he gets jealous and angry

    I can't deal with it anymore, it's just too annoying. I hate to be the friend that gives up on someone, but these past few months of this has been enough. Should I break the friendship? if so, how?
     
  2. killswitch0029

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    You could straight-up tell him you're tired of all the bullshit and break things off that way. If you'd rather not give up entirely and are still convinced he needs another shot, give him an ultimatum of some kind to try and curb his behavior.
     
  3. JonSomebody

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    When you asked for advice the first time and after getting it ...you decided to give that friendship a second chance. I just feel that when you made this decision...you were very much aware of the circumstances that you would be dealing with when doing so. Although I feel when you made this decision...its nothing to feel ashamed or bad about because it just showed how much you care about having this person in your life but on just a platonic friendship basis. Now...apparently...this guy got his mind made up on the status of your relationship and its not what you want and therefore...for me...if he's not willing to comprehend to where you stand then yes...I feel there is nothing else you can do but to move on because at this point .... you are definitely wasting your time and energy with this guy and what draw red flags for me is that he is playing a lot of games in order to wear you down to come to terms with what he wants which is a relationship and from what you've mentioned...you just want a platonic friendship. He sounds very controlling and if this is the case...just imagined if you were interested in him...this is something that you would have to deal with in the long run. He sounds like one of those people that feels its either their way and that's it...So...as far as I'm concerned...giving him a second chance has confirmed that this is a done deal and its time to let go and move on. Best wishes...JS
     
    #3 JonSomebody, Sep 20, 2016
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2016