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Crush is straight and comes from a conservative family...

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Spoopy Monster, Sep 25, 2016.

  1. Spoopy Monster

    Regular Member

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    So I'm an ftm (afab and still biological female, unfortunately) and I have a serious crush on this girl. We'll call her 'Kay' for now.
    So I've known Kay for a little while now, and she has definitely been one of my close friends. But recently, I've developed feelings for her. She's a performer, only slightly older than me (like, a little over than a year), and we have a lot of the same interests. (not to mention she's SUPER cute ^-^ ) But she also knew me before when I was a 'girl' (idk, that's the only way I can word that).
    So last time I was at one of her shows (a few weeks ago) I decided to try and drop some 'hints' that I liked her, just to see how she'd respond, I guess.
    Long story short, some things that happened were:
    * I was looking at her the whole time and thought she didn't see me, only to later find out that she was looking at me the whole time as well.
    * She came and found me before anyone else at intermission and before the show (unfortunately, not after :C ) and I tried to stay as close to her as possible.
    * When we were walking, I decided to ask (as politely and inconspicuously as I could) what her orientation was, even though I already knew. But what she said kinda surprised me. She said "I'm hetero. But... Well, I guess I've never really thought about it...". She continued to tell me that she's never dated anyone before 'because she's a loser." -which is NOT true.
    That night in the car, my mom and I were talking about stuff when my ex came up. I told her I was pretty much over her and that I didn't really have a crush on anyone else... except this one person. I told her it was Kay and she looked kinda shocked. She said that she thought she was straight and I nodded. She told me that I shouldn't let it go any further for two reasons.
    1) (AGAIN) She's straight so she probably won't be interested.
    2) Her family is, for the most part, pretty conservative. (Now I don't really know much of her family, so I don't know)
    Idk... I've talked to some of my friends about it, and a lot of them have said 'go for it'. Mainly because I'm "technically a guy" I guess. I honestly don't know what to do. I really like her, and it's kinda getting harder to be around her. What should I do? :icon_redf
     
  2. Gravity

    Full Member

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    In general, I wouldn't say not to date someone because other people think it might be a bad idea (family/parents while you're still a minor is potentially another thing, but that doesn't sound like a major issue here - your mom is just giving an opinion).

    It's possible her family situation would put too much pressure on her to be relaxed in a relationship, or that she really is straight or otherwise simply not attracted to you. But the first step is finding out how *she* feels about this. If you're getting vibes that she might be interested too, ask her how she feels, and go from there. :slight_smile: