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I still love her...

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by MerBear, Oct 26, 2016.

  1. MerBear

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    So in previous posts, you may know. My ex girlfriend broke up with me two months ago. She said she needed to be alone and get mental help and wanted to stay friends then when I did, she pushed me away, laughed at me, and was just so mean and later on I found out, she just left me for someone else, and tried to lie about it. And I gave her back all of her stuff and I didn't talk to her for awhile but I had a bad issue with checking her twitter...because I still wanted to know how she was doing and she checked mine for a while and made remarks about it but never the less. Another time, I asked her something and she replied "I don't regret the decision I took because now I met the person I want to spend the rest of my life with" and again I don't why she had to tell me that part because it wasn't relevant to what I said... it was like she was trying to prove something

    I recently messaged her because she was trying to sell the stuff I gave her on twitter like it was Craigslist and I knew that she was just being petty and what not, and I told her that if she doesn't want them, that she can just give them back to me and long story short, she said how she doesn't care anymore, she doesn't even care if I hurt myself...and that kind of hurt a bit but I never asked for her to care.. I just don't understand why she feels the need to remind me, and she said I need to move on and I wanted to explain that moving isn't that easy, and she has no right to tell me to move on if she's never had to herself. But I didn't and kept my mouth shut about it

    She said she thinks it sickening that I stalk her twitter but she could've just blocked me if she didn't like it. But she hasn't even after I suggested it. I've gone days without checking it before but it's hard sometimes so I kind of uninstall the app, and what not.

    Twitter is really the only kind of ventilation I hold and express myself on and knowing she's on there heightens my curiousity.

    I still love her, and she after our conversation, went on her Twitter and posted a bunch Childs play gifs and dolls and she knows how much I hate dolls so that was another petty thing.


    I'm asking you to not judge me here for checking her twitter, okay? I'm trying to learn not to do it and I'm not the only one who has done to. I just need advice on how to start moving more and withhold my temptations from checking her twitter.

    I haven't been in contact with her hardly so I can't be fine without talking to her.
    It's been 2 months and I was only with her 5 months so I'm kind of still lost...

    I can't have proper sex anymore, I'm having trouble getting turned on and everything and usually even when I was hung up on someone, it wasn't a problem. But now suddenly it is.

    I got a new job making good money and I should be happy about because I've been looking for a job for the past 6 months and I haven't been able to but I'm not even happy about it...

    Just please don't judge me. I get it , I'm stupid for checking her social media and everything but I'm trying not to

    So if someone could give me some advice on moving on, that'd be greaat.
    I've hung out with friends more, I've went outside more but nothing's working and I feel I'm falling into a pit of depression

    ---------- Post added 26th Oct 2016 at 04:03 PM ----------

    I know that she's happy with someone else and I don't expect her at all to come back. I don't. I just still care about her and what not, and I really hate it
     
  2. MerBear

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    I hate it
     
  3. MsAnchor

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    No judgement here Merbear(*hug*)
    Its ok what you re going through is what a lot of people go through after a break up and it can become an addiction but you need to condition yourself one step at a time, one day at time to let go of this.
    Actively work on your self, its a great step uninstalling your twitter account, make an even better step by blocking her off all your social media accounts.
    After that be kind to your self, go out and have fun, if possible try to organize a trip even if its a weekend trip somewhere to shift yourself from where you are mentally.
    Meet up with your friends, make plans, go out and have fun even if it is hard at first the 'fake it till you make it' will work swiftly once you put your mind to it.

    Everyone has been there, getting over someone is not easy and doesn't happen overnight but its unnecessary prolonging the process, you have one life and the right person is out there, once you ve worked on yourself and managed to build up your self worth and self esteem without external factors you will have the best relationship you can imagine.
    Sending you supportive vibes
     
  4. MerBear

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    I just hate the fact even though she lied to me and put me through hell for no reason and then said how she doesn't regret it, how she doesn't care about me that I still blame myself for everything. I don't want to feel like this all my fault but I don't want to blame her at all it feels like.

    I've been hanging out with friends more but it's still kind of hard. I feel like once I start my job it will be easier but that's not until a month from now