So my mom thinks my dad had an affair. I don't know maybe he did, but he passed in 2012 from cancer. She wants me be his replacement. I don't want to. As a child i was very sick and had to have heart surgery. I had few close brushes with death, so I no what it is like to almost die. For what ever reason I feel like my mom has a lot resentment against me. It's like very sight of me makes her mad. This what makes me believe that she may not be my real mom. If that is the deal than how do i find out? I do have birth defect that is genetic and no one my family or extended family has it. I have hinted at my mother, but she quickly responds that she would have known if I was not her baby. I know that there a lot of drama that surrounds me, so is why suspect. Also I feel that my mom has no right to accuse my dad of such a thing if he not around to defend himself. Apparently, when my dad was in hospice the woman whom is allegedly a mother of his child came and wanted payment. This may or may not be me. My response to this get court ordered parnity test and problem solved. I have tried to get my mom go to therapy, but she hate psychologist with a passion thinks they are drug pushers and lie to you. sorry about the post I just needed to get this off my chest. thank you for listening
WOW!!! I feel so sorry for you. Just something that you may want to consider if I may. First of all...if you think that your mom may not be your real mom then I believe you should be able to find out by a paternity test. Also, before having that done...perhaps you can speak to some relatives like his mom or siblings or relatives and even his close friends who may be able to give you some kind of information. Lastly, perhaps you have a lot of your father's ways such as; personality and character and looks that could trigger your mom to resent you especially if their relationship was not the best. I know for myself...my mom and I did not get along especially after my dad had passed away. I was really close with my dad and everyone said that I looked so much like him that I looked like a younger version of him. My mom also accused my father of having an affair and the way she would treat me as opposed to my other siblings made me wonder if I too was adopted and had another mother. Her behavior towards me continued throughout my teenage years and when I came out as a gay man...things took a turn for the worst and I thought things could not have gotten worse than what I was going through at the time..but they did. There were times where all my siblings would gather at my mom's house on the weekends and just hang out. I never forget this one time which still lives within my heart. My mom loved gardening and had the best looking flowers on the street. This one particular day...she was out in the front yard tending to her flowers and some of my siblings were on the porch and the front porch stoop laughing and talking with her. My mom had the biggest grin on her face while listening to one of my siblings telling a story and all of a sudden..she saw me driving up in front of the house and all of a sudden...that grin quickly disappeared to a nasty frown and she even rolled her eyes in disgust. I never forget how my heart dropped and the pain that went through my chest at that visual. With that being said...yes..I thought like you have that maybe I was not her child especially one day after my brother had broken into my house and robbed me and I filed a police report and my mom got into a big argument with me and told me that she had wished she had flushed me down the toilet because I was an embarrassment to her and the family. So..you can see why I thought that. However, I really want to say in your case from what you have mentioned in your post that it could be a possibility of you reminding your mother so much of your father that she has taken her resentment out on you. Just trying to give you another option. I wish you the best ...JS
I dunno... just because if y our dad Did have and affair with another woman, and bore a child, that doesn't mean it was you- that child may be somewhere else. I dunno - there may not be a child from an affair at all. Perhaps blood tests from yourself and maybe your mom? Do you have your birth certificate? Is your mom's name on it? Take care!!!
Hey, Is your Mom Christian? Sometimes when Christian's feel this way about Western medicine therapists, they go to Christian counselours. Often when people feel that way about mainstream counseling, they go to faith based counseling and feel better about it. Have you tried talking to your mom about seeing a Christian counselor? Take care
