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Could use some help: I think I'm never having a relationship

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Jolly Hermione, Nov 11, 2016.

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  1. Jolly Hermione

    Jolly Hermione
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    Hi everyone

    Once a month I have a real low, where I question my whole life, I think about how lonely I am and how I don't like myself. I think I'm never going to be in a relationship.

    People tell me that after school it gets really hard to find someone you can relate to. I don't want to believe them, but that's the only thing I hear.

    I probably shouldn't ask this question (in case I'm putting more pressure on me), but I want to know some things:

    How old where you when met your boy/girlfriends?
    Was it in school or somewhere else?

    Thanks for answering. Don't worry about me, I'm getting up possibly. That low only stays for about 24 hours... I'm going to get out of it.
     
    #1 Jolly Hermione, Nov 11, 2016
  2. questions4ever

    questions4ever
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    I'm sorry you weren't/aren't feeling great. I still haven't been in a relationship either so I'm not much help. Just know that you can and will find someone (sometimes it takes a while). My sisters 20 and straight and hasN't had a boyfriend. Any way just know you're not alone and that I completely understand the struggle to find a queer girl and both be into each other. My current interest I actually met at church. Any way feel free to message me. Best of luck! (((Hugs))
     
    #2 questions4ever, Nov 12, 2016
  3. Chiroptera

    Chiroptera
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    Hey Jolly Hermione

    That's untrue. Of course, some people find their partners on college, and it ends up being a nice place to meet people. But it is not the only place, and it is not like "i have to find someone now, because it gets really harder after this!".

    Look at the Later in Life section: There are people who find their partners after a really long time, outside college, and they are fine and happy!

    Of course, i'm not saying you will take a long time, but my point is: Don't rush it, and don't worry too much about it. College and school aren't the only opportunities, and i'm not even sure if i would classify these as the "easiest places to find someone" (especially since there are lots of young people in these places who don't want something serious).

    To sum it up:

    -College is a nice place to meet new people, but it is not the only place, and peraphs not the best place for this.

    -Don't worry too much about rushing it. You are still really young!

    -Being in a relationship is good, but it isn't necessarily better than being single. Quoting Owen:

    Take a look at this thread, it may shed some light into some of your questions: http://emptyclosets.com/forum/famil...king-relationship-simpler-than-you-think.html
     
    #3 Chiroptera, Nov 12, 2016
  4. OGS

    OGS
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    College is probably one of the easier places to meet people, but it certainly isn't the only one. As far as when I met my husband: we met when I was 27 I think which would have made him 31. We met in a bar. I was there with an ex of mine (I didn't meet him in school either). We've been together for 18 years.

    The thing I would say is that you should probably put thoughts of a romantic relationship aside for now and work on your relationship with yourself. If, as you say, you really don't like yourself it's going to stand in the way of someone else having strong feelings for you.
     
    #4 OGS, Nov 12, 2016
  5. RainbowsFactory

    RainbowsFactory
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    First of all, I live in Switzerland too! :slight_smile:

    I have never had a boyfriend however, my parents met at work. I think that you can meet people anywhere honestly!
     
    #5 RainbowsFactory, Nov 12, 2016
  6. be chill

    be chill
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    Hey Jolly Hermonie,
    Don't worry. I came out to a friend that was going to my school and that I know he was gay as I was coming out to my close friends. He was cute and nice and we were close to making out, but it didnt work out, he was in a critical point in his academic life and I still wasnt out to a lot of people.
    Then, I met this cut guy on ******, we have been in a relationship by almost two months now and it is going great!
    So, as you can see, school is not a huge element in your dating life. It sure is a good social platform to find people to hang out in general, but you can find people to have a relationship with at a ton of places :slight_smile:
     
    #6 be chill, Nov 13, 2016
  7. Jolly Hermione

    Jolly Hermione
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    Hi everyone

    Thank you very much for your answers!

    Well yeah, I think I looked too much to my younger brother, who has had over ten girlfriends... So I thought I was kinda weird. Thank you very much! Maybe one time I find someone ^^

    Oh thanks, I forgot, that this post existed, I even bookmarked it :icon_redf Time to read it more carefully! Thank you!

    Yeah, I hear that I lot. The thing is, I only have a problem with myself when I don't feel good. Right now everything is okay and I have absolutely no problem with myself (well no big problems :wink: ).
    Thank you, I will work on myself ^^

    Nice ^^
    Well, I count work to school, because you have to be there (actually you don't, but you know what I mean). But thank you! As I said maybe I just have to wait ^^

    Yeah. I think for now, I'm just working on myself and then one day I'm ready to accept myself ^^


    Thank you all! (*hug*)
     
    #7 Jolly Hermione, Nov 13, 2016
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