In a recent chat with my mom she mentioned there are lots of girls who don't want to have sex and I could marry one and have a doctor inseminate her with my sperm so we could have kids. I just don't even know where to start with this one. The ridiculousness and hurtfulness of the suggestion is baffling. Do I even confront her about it or just chalk it up with "she needs more time to accept my sexuality"? I should mention she has a history of being anti-sex, which also bothers me because I adopted her way of thinking earlier, which prevented me from ever accepting my sexuality in the first place. Her words after I officially came out to her: "whether you have a boyfriend or girlfriend, I just hope that you're celibate." Yup, that sums up my mom's attitude towards sex right there. Not "I hope you're happy," it's "I hope you're celibate." It makes me angry and frustrated and I wish she knew how much harder she is making things on me with these kinds of statements. :bang:
I'm so sorry that sounds tough. Just try to realize that that is how she was brought up. I would be honest about how you feel on the issue. If she's religious, you can find spiritual arguments on google. Please message me if you want. Hope this was a little helpful!
From a similar situation, and I agree - its how she was brought up. Be honest if you can. If you feel like you can't, just listen, and then walk away. You don't have to agree, just try and be patient/understanding. I know it's hard.
I love how friendly and supportive people are on this site, and I also like the idea of listening, speaking up if I need to, but then walking away. I just may never convince her that being gay is ok, and that's something that I'm going to have to accept. I appreciate the feedback very much
Also she likely wants to protect you. She likely worries same sex intercourse equals STD's and heterosexual sex equals pregnancy. Back in the 1980's abstinence was preached as the only safe sex. Aids was new and terrifying. June
Yes, I'm sure that's part of it. But she traditionally has been anti-sex regardless of whether it's of the heterosexual or homosexual variety. It's clear to me that it has more to do with her own issues than with what I'm doing, but I just wish I didn't have to bear the brunt of her issues this way. I work for an institution that is not LGBT-friendly so I have to remain closeted at work to keep my job, and I'm sure many LGBT people in the US along with me are feeling discomfort and concern at the thought of Trump becoming president. All that to say, with the usual crap I have to worry about the last thing I want to deal with is my mother trying to push me back in the closet, and it's extremely emotionally draining when she does. I was once talking to a good friend of mine about this and I said it shouldn't matter how my parents feel about my sexuality, to which she replied it shouldn't but it does (and she's right, at least in my case...).
