Alright so the story is that after 2 or 3 years of being friends with the guy I like, I started to have lots and lots of feelings for him. His looks are okay but his personality is what I adore. I'm a male and openly gay to some of my friends and I came out to him so he knows that I'm gay. So over the course of a few years, this year in particular is when I started to notice if he was gay and has feelings for me. Some clues I started to realize was that he NEVER talks about girls like ever! He talks with girls but never about having feelings for them or even liking one at all. Another sign I saw was that he gets really touchy around me and not any of his other guy friends, not saying I'm arguing, but like he puts his hands on my shoulders and when we high-five he still grabs onto my hand for a longer period of time. And recently I went to his house for the first time since we've met and every time I sat down on his couch, and there was a lot of space to sit down on like the other couch in the room or a chair but he decided to sit right next to me, which I found so sweet! Plus once we sat next to each other, our knees would touch or our feet will touch it was just the greatest day of my life. And there was also one point where he leaned his head towards my shoulder to see who I was texting with and I just stared at his eyes thinking of going for a kiss but I didn't because I'm still not sure of his sexuality. I know I shouldn't be speculating about his sexuality because I don't think I have a right too but this is like the first time I've been thinking about someone nonstop. We made some plans to go see Moana over the winter break so hopefully there I could do something to figure out his sexuality or I could ask but that's why I'm here. I want your guy's advice on what I should do in this situation and your ideas if he kinda has feelings for me or whatever. If you read my entire essay, I'd like to say thanks for your time in reading and hopefully you can give me some advice on this situation. Anything is very much appreciated and again thank you!
It definitely sounds like he's into you. But how do you play this? There are two ways to go: let all these non-verbal body-language cues escalate by doing the same things yourself, only stronger. That's the way I used to think things should work. They do, rarely, with someone who is on exactly the same wavelength. What works a lot more often is to "escalate" to actual spoken words. This is so difficult for us shy people, but practice makes better. "I was thinking about you yesterday." "What direction would you like our friendship to go?" "Are we getting more emotional?" Or even the direct "I think our relationship is heating up. What do you think?" ---------- Post added 8th Dec 2016 at 10:40 AM ---------- When I said two ways to go, the first paragraph was way one and the second paragraph was way two. I kind of dropped only one shoe in the first paragraph. Should have proofread.
I think that, if you guys are close friends, it shouldn't be too weird to ask him if he's interested in anyone... If he says he likes a girl or guy, well then, you got your answer. Of course, some people dodge this question, but a lot of the time people won't if they're into you too. Sometimes they will, but usually not. Anyway, if that doesn't work, I still think you should very carefully find a way to verbalize things to him, just to test the waters. Don't just blurt out "I love you!" because he might not, but maybe do as the person above said, aka say something like "What do you think of me?" or "How do you see our friendship going down the line?" or something like that... I wouldn't take the person's last advice though, with the "heating up" phrase... There's no way you can back out of that one if it turns out the feelings aren't mutual. I know this is exciting, but don't put all your feelings out there unless you're okay with heartbreak or if you feel assured enough that he might like you back... I mean, heartbreak is sometimes better than keeping things in, but that's not the case for everyone- you do you.
Thank you for the replys! I really appreciate it, and well tomorrow I'm actually going to see him somewhere so it'll be nice to see him and hang out. Maybe I could ask him about his sexuality or maybe wait until we go see a movie together or something like that over winter break. But again thanks so much for the advice!
You should go for it. Life is too short to live with regrets! Just ask him who he's into next time you hang out with him. Good luck!
