For those of you who read my giant saga of a post on a weird relationship, I am really having withdrawals right now. I was up late one night because I was sooo angry with this person. I exercised until I couldn't stand, because I felt like punching the wall. I hadn't seen them for awhile, but today I did. I was surprised that I still felt a small amount of attraction to them, but mostly a sense of regret. Was it because things didn't work out the way I hoped? Was it because I pity that person? Or was it because I felt sorry for the people who are fooled by them? In any case, I was deeply sad, yet still felt some attachment. Is this a phase of grieving? I just am tired of always looking for them, the illusion of the person I thought I liked. The illusion I see in public. I had to let this out.
I think I know exactly where you're coming from. I removed myself from this person as much as possible, and the days I see him, I do end up kind of angry. But the more I go on the more I pity him, because he is the epitome of an extremely unhappy person. Seriously though, work on yourself, focus on yourself, and things'll get much better. Don't regret stuff. Had you not experienced certain things and learned from it you wouldn't be who you are today. Just get up every day with the motivation to be a better you by the time you head back to bed.
I think it's normal to miss "the good times" with an ex. I'm in a loving, happy relationship and sometimes I still miss my ex girlfriend. This might sound cliche but after some time I realize I don't miss her, I miss how good I used to feel with her. And people change with time. Even If I went out of my way to see her just for a friendly chat, she'd no longer be the person I used to date. She'll have grown into some new person that I just don't know. In the same rights that I've changed, and she knows nothing about who I am now. It just takes some time. It gets easier and you think of them less, but it does come back once in a blue moon. But the pain of it will ease.
People who are a big deal in your life can stir up feelings even if you think you have moved on. It's unlikely that seeing them will ever not make you feel something. I had my heart broken really bad once, and the other day I found the girl's Instagram. I have moved on by now, but seeing her face and pictures of her life made me feel a lot of things and get emotional. It's okay to get upset for a little bit, it's bound to happen. And it's healthy. Then you can move on again.
You're right. I need to step back and focus on my life. Finding motivation is hard, but overall I think I've been doing ok. I just got thrown yesterday, that's all. Time to brush myself off and get back on the horse. Thanks heythere999, Sebby45
