So. This might be long and sound stupid but I really need some help. I have a great friend, he's a guy (were both 19 and im female, and both bi, but thats irrelevant), I've been friends with him since I was 11-12, and he is honestly one of my best friends. I have anxiety and depression he's the one who talks to me about it and helps me feels less embarrassed about things, he also really helped when I had mild bulimia when I was 15, im fine now mostly! But he's one of the very few people I can completely comfortable with. He has told me that he had a crush (juvenile word I know, sorry) on me on and off through secondary school (age 11-16), which is fine. But we are really really close friends, I've stayed over, cuddles always happen. We are really close. The problem is he says he now likes my other bestie who is also a girl, and I am super close with. And I have the biggest, hugest, doe eyed, wobbly knees, heart flutter, cliches.... crush on him. For half a year. My dilemma is, literally right this second, im talking to him on fb, and he says he wants to go on a friends date that means nothing, just hang out, as a "post-crush date" (his words, and hilariously ironic), and stupid me just agreed. Cause im that gone. But what does that mean?! WHAT DO I DO???? I cant loose him as a friend, he means to much, but I dont think I can do the pretend thing any more as its really triggering for my anxiety/depression..... But I cant ruin anything that might happen between him and my friend, cause thats more important than me if thats whats happening, but I cant help but imagine that he likes me? Typical dumb drama basically, sorry for wasting your time, but I could do with some help!!! Thanks xxx
I think you should definitely tell him that you have a crush on him before he starts going on a date with someone else. He's told you before how he feels, and considering how close and open you two are, you should be able to tell him how you feel and then the both of you can try to deal with it together. Maybe he feels the same too, and if you don't tell him, you might regret it later on.
If he still has feelings for your friend and is working through that, I would wait to say anything - but if the "post crush date" is about him not having a crush on your friend anymore, then I would suggest telling him how you feel. It's easy to think about this sort of thing - revealing feelings to a friend - in terms of "what if it doesn't work out." But, on the other hand, what if it does? Many people say that the best relationships are built on friendship, and it sounds like you've already gotten signs of mutual interest in the past.
