Is it worth telling him I like him before he leaves?

Hey ThatOneK1d,

I think this is something that you have to decide for yourself, since only you really know the overall situation in detail.

What about making a list of the pros and cons, from your point of view, if you were to decide to tell him? Do you have any reason to believe that he might have the same type of feelings for you that you have for him?

How important is his friendship to you? If he doesn't return your romantic feelings, could that wreck your friendship?

Long-distance relationships are hard and you will have little contact with him during basic training. Is he going on Active Duty (thus expecting to be sent somewhere else on a duty assignment once he completes basic training)?

Just some things you might want to consider.

 

Hey ThatOneK1d,

So what stress do you think you'll be putting on him by letting him know that you have romantic feelings for him?

If he doesn't feel the same way, you said that your friendship is strong enough to remain and as long as you accept whatever he decides about the relationship between the two of you, would there really be any additional pressure on him?

If it turns out the he DOES feel the same way about you, then you could be a source of strength for him (the boy back home) when he is going through basic training.

And, of course, if you have a crush on him, leaving it unspoken and unresolved once he goes off to basic training could be very emotionally draining for you. If you don't tell him about your feelings for him before he leaves for basic training, telling him in a letter or on the phone during any short, intermittent communication while he is in basic training would definitely be a distractor that he wouldn't need, so it would then be much better for you to just wait until he completes basic training. That seems like a long time to wait if you have strong feelings for him.

Just some more thoughts.

 

you are friends. friends dont keep secrets. i say tell him. why.... because you are eventually going to tell him in the future. you will write him a note or something down the road. so why wait until then. tell him now while you are together. then you will know how he feels about you and whatever will or will not be will be. i will say that you need to be a grown up though and realize just because you like him doesnt not mean he will like you back and if you are going to get all weird and dramatic if he doesnt like you or want you then keep it to yourself because who needs all that drama in their head before going to basic??!! nobody! so if you can man-up and be like "hey i like you and i just wanted to tell you that and if you arent into me like that its totally fine and theres no drama, weirdness, messiness or issues and we are still bros and i wont bring it up again.but if you do like me back lets get it on b4 you leave hahahaha" . just make it a non issue and if he doesnt like you then just act like nothing has changed. but again if you are going to get all emo if it doesnt go your way just save him and you the drama.

 

Best of luck with whatever you decide!

 

Dude, no! Be strong! Do what you think is best for both you and him.

If you leave anything 'hanging', one or both of you are likely to regret it in the longrun. Leaving a relationship without clear resolution for either of you is never good.

Just my 2 cents!