Ok, so, the title of this thread probably sounds stupid. What I mean is, say you're lesbian for example, do you just flirt with any girl you're attracted to? Or, do you only flirt with girls you know are gay (or bi, etc.)? The latter seems like less of a risk, or at least less daunting, but it can also be limiting. You could miss out on a girl that might be gay but you just don't know. I feel like it's the same thing when a guy tries to flirt with a girl or vice versa. There's always a chance of rejection. It just seems scarier as a gay person because if the other person is straight, the rejection might be worse, because unfortunately there's still a stigma surrounding homosexuality. But what do you guys do personally?
Hi kendall, I'm also a lesbian and I try to flirt with girls that I would consider dating. This is because I'm attracted to more feminine presenting girls, and most of them look very straight. If the girl that you're flirting with is straight, she won't be expecting that you're flirting with her and most likely won't pick up on it from my experience. There will always be a fear of rejection, but don't be afraid of who you are. Even if people judge you, if you are strong, you can help other people accept their sexuality. There is an art involved, however: the art of subtlety. I personally like to make compliments a little bit more than friendly. There's a difference between "I like your dress" and "that dress looks good on you." I also like to buy coffee for a girl I'm interested in during lunch. Normally, friends don't randomly buy other friends coffee and go there just the two of them, but it's something that most straight girls don't pick up on. You have to find your own way of flirting and your own comfort zone. It took me a while to be able to flirt with people because I thought that I was being way too obvious when I really wasn't; my brain is wired to immediately pick up on any sign that any girl human is flirting with me, but the brains of straight girls aren't. It's something that takes confidence and courage, but it will become easier.
No...I don't flirt with any girl I'm attracted to. I do have to know if they're gay/bi and I also have to know how compatible we are in basic conversation before I attempt it. I tend to be pretty conservative when it comes to this sort of thing though, so obviously there is more caution involved.
