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Anger Issues/ Family problems

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by DarkWhite, Apr 22, 2017.

  1. DarkWhite

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    I gave up trying to get my family to accept me or talking to them about my gender( I rather didn´t mention my sexuality). In fact I actually regret I came out to them, because when I came out mother was supporting and brother very curious. This attitude lasted only few days (if there even were something to last). Now my mother is pretending like I´ve never said anything and brother is laughing at me and insulting me. I dont feel sad because I knew they wouldn´t accept me. They are just too "closed minded" to do that. But I can´t stand the insults off that little brat anymore. (He is only one year younger than me so he knows very well what is he doing.)

    Normally I´m not an agressive person and I guess my self control is very good. However insults on my gender are just too much. Does he think it´s funny? How about I come to him and do the exactly same thing? How would he like that if our roles were switched? Well I guess he would be mad and maybe even cry. But he doesn´t care because it´s not him, it´s me.

    You see I cant afford to look like boy now because of my family and school. So I have only one set of boy clothes and a wig. I put them on almost every evening when everyone are asleep so I don´t have to deal with them. Unfortunately today my brother wasn´t asleep and came to my room. He saw me and started to make fun out of me.

    You have no idea how much I would like to come to him and crack his skull in half. I would make that little sh*t cry and ask "You like it? No? Then why did you make feel like this you piece of trash?" I know it´s harsh or maybe even evil, so I don´t wanna do it. But he needs to be taught a lesson and sadly words aren´t helping. I needed to ventile myself out somehow so I took piece of paper, wrote "IDIOT" on it and sticked it onto his door.

    I know he is going to tell mother tomorrow and I will have no defence cause she is "closed minded" too. It sucks and it´s unfair. Who the hell are they to judge me? To tell me what is normal and acceptable and what is not? It´s just mean.

    But to the point - if this keep going on, I´m gonna hurt my brother. And I´ll hurt him badly. Writing something on a paper really doesnt make my anger go away. And I refuse to sit and wait till I move away from our house. So I want to ask... What should I do? Is there any way how to make brother shut up or I just have to do it the "hard way?"

    Sorry for my english and for sounding like little kid.
     
  2. JonSomebody

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    My heart goes out to you at this time. Unfortunately, for you...and from what I am guessing from your initial post that you are underage and still in school. This will make it very difficult for you to go out on your own. A cousin of mine who had took me to my first gay club and went behind my back and told one of my older brothers and later on I found out that she had invited him and some of his friends to the gay club in order to catch me in the act so to speak. However, that particular night, I did not show up. Anyway, my brother took this information back to my mom and my siblings which caused a lot of turmoil and ridicule from the family towards me. I was only 19 years old at that time and had not yet became fully acceptable or comfortable with the fact of being gay. Not only was I picked on like you by a younger sibling but I was also attacked by my older brother and sisters as well. Things got so bad that while I was at work...they would break the lock off my bedroom door and destroy the room as if a hurricane had caused the damage looking for something to validate that I was actually gay. My whole family became so humiliated by this information that I was forced to move out of the house. Fortunately for me..I was dating my first boyfriend who was much older than myself and he moved me in with him. I did not see or hear from my family for over four years. Even to this day...I am still not accepted by many of my siblings for my sexual identity and is treated really bad by them as if I am not a member of the family at all. However for me...I was surrounded with someone who was older and wise in so many ways that his behavior rubbed off on me which made me grow up fast. With all of this being said..the only thing that I can say to you is that if you do not have anyone who you can stay with and is comfortable with you being yourself...then a lot of your brother's antics you will have to endure especially since you are not getting any support from your remaining family members. Therefore, perhaps you could obtain a part time job somewhere in order to keep you away from the house to avoid your brother's behavior and possibly hide or put your other clothes and wig somewhere out of reach. When living in an environment of close minded people comes with a lot of judgment. This is something that they will have to come to terms on their own if they happen to do so...not from your persistence of voicing out your feelings especially when they are not comfortable with your sexual identity. Just something to consider. I wish you well...JS
     
  3. DarkWhite

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    Thanks for your advices and support. Yea I´m still at school but I am 18 which in our country is age when you are considered adult. I´m sorry to hear about you and your family.What some people do is just stupid sometimes. Fortunately I don´t think my family is going to be that agressive. I mean they hate it and despise it but they won´t do anything physical. They only told me that when I´m going to start my transition I should look for another house. As for job, I keep trying to get one however there are no jobs nearby which quite sucks. And I don´t really like staying with people when I don´t have to. Well I guess I just have to survive untill I finish the school. Thx
     
  4. JonSomebody

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    Thanks for responding. I will say this...you are 18 and in my country too that is considered as an adult too. Therefore, try to find you some part time employment until you have finished school. Just like me...I too like staying by myself unless its someone I am in a committed relationship with. Unfortunately, due to your situation...you will have to survive until you finish school but obtaining some type of employment will reduce the drama you are receiving at home so to speak. Good Luck...JS:thumbsup::smilewave
     
  5. LostTribe

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    Hahahaha, just like what I feel like doing to my whole family and few more of my enemies.

    Forget about it, your family will never accept you for who you are. I can confirm from experience with my own family and other families. It's their human nature to divide the sexes into 2 opposite categories, anything in between will seem like "degeneracy" to the human gene pool. Those kind of people almost never change.

    I advice you stop taking them seriously, just stop. Realize they are blinded by their primal survival urges. They aren't mentally capable to expand their brains. They are animals living back in the cave ages where each move was a matter of life and death, no matter how many iphones you gonna shower them with and show them it's a modern world. They aren't built for a modern world, most of humanity isn't built for it mentally.

    Develop self respect, which is a crucial part of masculinity. Whoever jabs at you, make them feel sorry.. in legal ways atleast :lol: Then stop caring about opinions of people who are your enemies or strangers, masculinity is not about impressing them or considering their opinion but the opinion of your own loyal gang. Buy more masculine clothes, lift weights, work on masculine body postures. You will feel awkward at first but eventually you will feel comfortable doing so. Build self reliance and independence, this is also part of masculinity then move out and find your own place where you feel belonging. f:***: anyone else.
     
  6. DarkWhite

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    Lost Tribe Wow you are optimism itself. I know it tho. As I said they are too closed minded and they have no will to change it. It's their choice tho, so be it.

    I stopped carring about what people think of me long time ago. Some people just aren't mature enough to accept it and that's their problem not mine. I don't take anything seriously in my life. You actually sounds pretty similar to me.

    So let me give you an advice. Our lifes sucks and it can't be helped whatsoever. But there are people whom can be helped and you need to be positive to do it. Fck your life dude just help and support people who need it. With positive words cause there is always hope. For them surely and I believe there is some left for us too.