I came out 7 years ago. Everyone was very supportive and helpful but I'm in my late 30's now and I don't have any gay friends. I really really want to connect with and meet like minded people and go on holidays/go to pride marches/enjoy their company but have no one to do these things with. I've been through a lot of tough times in my life and at this stage I just want to fully relax, be myself and enjoy myself for a while. I think I'm possibly still tethered to my parents underlying disapproval of being gay. While they are accepting and understanding I think they're more than happy for me to stay single for the rest of my life so I can go and look after them in their old age. I find myself latching on so tightly to unhealthy straight friendships just so I won't be lonely. I am determined to move on and start to fully enjoy life on my terms. I have some ideas of how to meet people but was wondering if anyone had any more tips? Thanks
Hello Amac and Welcome to EC! It's great to read that your anxious to move on and start to enjoy life. Here are some suggestions: 1. Check and see if there is an LGBT center in Aberdeen. If there is, look into their program offerings and see if you can get involved. The centers are always looking for people to participate. 2. Do you have a hobby or sport interest? If so, there should be various U.K. Groups with affiliates in Aberdeen that you might get involved with. Whether it is a running group (International Frontrunners), an LGBT sports league (squash, football, rugby, tennis, etc), a walking or hiking group (numerous ones throughout the U.K.), a birdwatching group, photography group, a supper club, so on and so on. 3. Check and see if there ar LGBT Meetups in your area, and look for ones with particular interests or focuses that you enjoy. 4. Find other LGBT charities to get involved with. 5. Just live life day to day and meet people as you go about your daily Routine! Meeting people and getting involved is a bit of a numbers game, the more you do the more you can network and meet others. Also, have some patience. Rome was not built in a day and meeting an LGBT social group will take time and perseverance. As you meet people, they in turn will introduce you to other people. You will never know whom you ultimately click with, so keep an open mind as your meeting others. Also, don't be shy about asking to meet friends of people you meet. I went throu this process after I came out and after a few years found myself amongst a tight knit group of friends. Now that I am in the process of relocating back to my home region, I find myself doing the same thing yet again. This time, however, I am taking everything I learned and doing so much more efficiently. Meeting others and getting involved is a fun part of the journey. Keep an open mind and you can soon find yourself immersed in the LGBT community!
See if your workplace has an LGBT staff group perhaps. If you're involved in your local political party/union they may have LGBT groups too. (I'm active in Unison and it's helped me make tons of LGBT friends!)
