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Old 18th May 2017, 04:59 PM   #1
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Explaining homosexuality to a hetero woman

Currently I'm going through the questioning stage myself, but I've managed to share my thoughts with my friend, and I told her about the possibility of me not being straight. I'm not sure about what my exact sexuality is, but I do experience attraction to women. My friend doesn't understand the dynamics of female-female relationships and how women can become sexually satisfied from being with women. In her words, "how can a woman become satisfied if there is no way of really having sex without toys or oral??"

I have never had a sexual experience with women before, so my argument was very limited, but I wanted a better way of explaining how two women feel when they love each other and how they experience sex differently. Any advice would be great and thanks in advance
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Old 18th May 2017, 05:56 PM   #2
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Re: Explaining homosexuality to a hetero woman

I'm sorry if this sounds crass but perhaps ask her which parts of sex she enjoys. It can't possibly be just the penetration. If that's all she got, would she be satisfied? That is just one part of the whole. If she got every other part minus the penetration, would she be satisfied?

Everybody likes different stuff during intimacy and we may or may not get or want penetration but that doesn't mean we aren't having a full and meaningful relationship.

My 2 cents.

Oh, and btw, any activity which, intentionally and consensually, has the potential to produce an orgasm is sex. No matter what you're doing.
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Old 18th May 2017, 06:19 PM   #3
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Re: Explaining homosexuality to a hetero woman

Hey Altruistic blue,

I have to agree with Really. Actual sex is about mutual satisfaction (in my opinion). Unless you are specifically trying to procreate, then the main point of sex with your partner is about mutual enjoyment/satisfaction.

Unfortunately, the true nature and reality of sexuality is not taught to most people. Many of us get a much-watered-down version that comes from the extremes of religious beliefs saying that the ONLY purpose of sexual interaction between two people "must" be for the creation of new life. Well, of course, that negates the millions of times that even these same religious 'zealots' have sex using prophylactics or simply not procreating... Doesn't it?

In reality, sex creates the closest bond that two people can have, regardless of gender, which creates a wonderful orgasm (as Reality said) for both partners - and again, regardless of the specific type of sexual activity between the two partners.

My thoughts.
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Old 18th May 2017, 06:51 PM   #4
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Re: Explaining homosexuality to a hetero woman

I don't want to get into details however women can use their hands to pleasure each other but externally and internally.
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Old 19th May 2017, 02:52 PM   #5
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Re: Explaining homosexuality to a hetero woman

Just say one word to her...


Done. (Sorry if that was too upfront lol). I'm a "to-the-point" person, so I'd also point out that her man clearly hasn't found her clit if she needs to ask that question! (Sorry again lol)
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Old 20th May 2017, 03:00 AM   #6
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Re: Explaining homosexuality to a hetero woman

Hi Altruistic,
In my experience, it is all about the deep emotional bond between two women who love each other. The expression of this emotional intimacy, in a sexual way is at the core of sexual satisfaction between two women. There are many ways for women to have sex, that don't include penetration at all (what Lynz said )

Not everyone will understand. Especially when sex-ed in schools etc. revolves largely around the sex act of penetration, preventing pregnancy etc., but not, as Quantum said,much about the true nature of expressing ourselves sexually.

You may not be able to explain this to your friend, but that's okay. Real amateur analogy here...but I for the life of me can't understand how everyone loves hummus, or how people can enjoy deep sea fishing. But people are so varied, what brings beauty, joy and satisfaction into a person's life won't always be understood by someone else.

Take care!
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Old 20th May 2017, 09:43 AM   #7
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Re: Explaining homosexuality to a hetero woman

Sexuality is all mental, and how it is physically expressed depends on the individuals. If anything, it's heterosexuals who are weird because they have to be specifically attracted to someone who looks and acts very different from themselves.
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Old 20th May 2017, 04:40 PM   #8
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Re: Explaining homosexuality to a hetero woman

But toys and oral are still sex....so why is she hinting "without" them?

Even straight women might not be satisfied if there was only jackhammer penetration and nothing else.

Teach her about the clitoris and how many orgasms lesbians have statistically.
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