I have just recently began talking to my ex boyfriend again. We agreed to talk and to take it slow and not rush into a relationship. We have dated 4 times before now. One of the main reasons are relationship doesn't work is because of his parents they are very against gay relationships. Most of my friends advised me not to talk to him again because are relationship never works out and It ends with me being depressed. Also because he will basically throw his heart out to whoever will give him attention. With my friends telling me this I began to question if he liked me or if he just likes me for the attention. So yesterday after about a month of talking I told him how much I still liked him and he said I like you too. Then I asked him about being in a relationship and he said that he just isn't a relationship type of guy but he really likes me so we agreed to stay in the talking phase which I am not to happy about. For the last week he has been getting very sexual and invited me over today talking about how he wanted to "do stuff". I said I would come over but I didn't. I feel like he is using me kinda in a way just for attention and wanting sex which upsets me because I really like him. He could not be though he says he really likes me. Idk just my friends telling me about how he starts liking whoever gives him attention has caused me to question whether or not I should talk to him. Do you think I am overreacting and that i should continue to talk with him or do you think I should stop talking to him
I have no experience in a situation like this. I however think you should talk to him about it Honesty and trust is the key. (And by the way: potato fistbump XD)
From what I've read in your post it sounds to me as if he is using you for his own benefit such as a Friends With Benefits situation. I think if you have been spending time with this guy after dealing with a previous breakup and now..he is telling you that he is not a relationship type of guy then in my opinion...you have to take a look at yourself and figure out what you want because its apparent that you are not happy with this current status of the bond you too are having at this time. In all honesty, if you are questioning the status of this relationship or better yet..what there is very little of...then perhaps you should follow your instincts and move on because in my opinion...from what I've read...this is not going to end well. However, its your decision if its worth hoping for the best.
I have to agree with Jon above. So often in relationships we believe we can change someone, or that they will 'see the light' if we just hang in there, so we hope and hope and stay involved (believe me I have been guilty of this!!!) The fact is, we can't change them, we can't make their needs and wants match ours, no matter how much we want to. So... If someone tells you 'he just isn't the relationship type of guy'-believe him. He's telling you all you need to know. He will not morph suddently into a guy who wants a relationship with you. If you want to have any sort of ANYTHING with him it's going to be on his terms. And, as was mentioned this will likely end up being a FWB situation. The fact that he says he likes you I don't doubt is true. I am sure he does like you...but not for a relationship. Bottom line is, you want a relationship and he doesn't. I know it's difficult because you do like him, but I would move on, to a guy who wants a relationship too. All the best to you!
