Hello ec, Bear with me as this may be lengthy. Recently my maternal grandmother passed away. My mother decided to have a memorial service in April when it is a bit warmer because it will be an outside service. I have been in my currant relationship for about 4-5 months and out to family and friends for a year and a half. My mother called and said my gf could come to the funeral but we could not hold hands.(you can come and bring gf but we don't want to see any affection between you even though your grandma just died.):icon_sad: I was offended and caught off guard. I said I couldn't promise that.....how am I supposed to know how I will react at my grandmothers memorial service? I feel its not fair...if I had a boyfriend she would never have this conversation with me. She made a comment like "well, some people don't like gay people". I countered with "Thats like saying some people don't like black people". She answered with something like "yes, some people don't like black people. Thats reality". I tried to reason with her but she wasn't making any connections. I am very offended and hurt by her request and statements. We haven't spoken in a few days since then. Anyone have any opinions or advice? :icon_sad:
Go and hold hands if you want to. Your mom does not have the right to ask you to not hold hands. Don't feed the prejudice of others. Yes, some people don't like black people, and some people don't like gay people, and all of those people need to get the **** over it. The only way for that to feasibly happen is for them to be exposed to people who are different than them. Seeing a lesbian couple might just convince some fence-sitters in the crowd, "Hey, they love and grieve just like we do. Guess they're not The Devil(tm) after all!"
I agree with maverick. If you want to hold hands, then hold hands. If you need a hug or whatever then hug. I'm sorry for your loss, and I hope that everything goes well.
