Ok so I need some help I am on a road trip to go vsit my grandparents and friends but they are babtist Christian ann I am very scared my mom told me this morning not to speak about it at all while I'm there but I am scared I look gay that's just how I dress I like showing the world I'm gay just in case there are any gay guys that might find me appealing but I am scared they won't love me any more one of my grandparents already known I'm gay and I was her favorite and now it's like I'm a like I'm a like I'm a piece of shit on the side of the road and I feel horrible and am very scared I just wish I had a bf to hold me and tell me it will be ok right now
If they pick up on anything, it won't be that you're gay. It's that you're scared that they'll find out. So the key thing is to keep calm. Find some serenity in the fact that if - IF - they find out, and if - IF - they have a problem with it, the problem lies with THEM, not with you. You are what you are. So go be the best Kcaz you can be. Lex
Hey Kcaz. I've been there with family and the Christian thing too. You're not alone. This time of year is normal for people to be anxious. This might sound strange, but make it a goal to be considerate of them; your family and the folks around them sound nervous. This is different for them. You are growing and they can too. so cut them some slack. We are all a work in progress. And who we ARE includes all of our interests, school, work, goals, memories, not just our sexuality. Second, consider the whole situation and do what the situation calls for in order for you to feel the most comfortable. If it makes you feel more comfortable, just change your clothes to something that won't shock them for a day or so. But if you'd rather not, then don't. Your clothes are what you wear, it is an expression of you, but it's not who you are. Kcaz, you are awesome and that is more than garments. Some of them may come around in time Kcaz. You may even be surprised and have some hugs where you didn't expect them. I am totally there with you Kcaz. I go home Saturday morning. I'm planning on the same approach. It's just a few days, then I get to come back to NYC and relax lol
omg yea imma gonna see if i can talk to my nana about it and tell her i still love her im actually at her house right now and am so scared
well i just found out my cousin is gay and even though he just told me i have just about always you kno liked him and he is 17 so yea but i kinda you kno wanna sleep with him now so i feel bad but im adopted and hes also my second cousin and as much as i really would hate to you kno do stuff with him i still have a strong feeling to sleep with him is that a bad thing ?
A 2nd cousin is someone with whom you share a great-grandparent, as the most recent common ancestor. It's usually allowed to marry second cousins. In terms of same-sex couples, there is no logical reason to avoid consanguinity anyway, since you can be sure there will be no resulting offspring. And anyway, you are adopted, so there wouldn't be any. It might result in really weird family politics, if you act on it. Of course, you certainly should not feel bad about being attracted to him, which is perfectly normal and natural. There is nothing wrong with your feelings. I recommend against just fooling around with him--the potential for resulting complications with your family isn't worth it. If the two of you were madly in love, or at least pursuing a serious relationship, that might be worth it. For just sex, you can find someone else.
Hey brah, i am glad you found an advocate. I am with Ian on this. Any physical stuff between you two might cause some extremely challenging situations in the future in your family and I would advise against it as well. I've been attracted to people in the past who I really wanted to sleep with too and it's not worth the heartache later just for a lil fooling around. You are a great young guy, please know that. Looking forward to hearing from you again
You never need a guy to hold you to fix your problems, that's your job. However, friends are just as effective for emotional support you just have to open up to them. As far as your situation, I recommend if you don't want to tell them now, then simply hide the traits you feel, "Give away" your identity. Chances are they won't say anything, just believe your lie. It doesn't feel good, but remember you're in a temprary situation. If you believe your lie, they will too.
