So now that I confessed my true feelings for my best friend I requested we take a break from our very co-dependent relationship, but I was utterly unprepared for the heartbreak that followed or much I would miss him. I've also disclosed these feelings to two very close female friends who are nothing short of brilliantly supportive but I guess I wasn't really prepared for the feeling of social isolation , since he and I share so many mutual friends, connections and even work groups. There are no more afternoon calls asking about my day or no one to turn to when I'm excited or sad. Sometimes I feel like calling or texting him and saying I don't want a time out, but I know I can't! So I've done all this honesty, coming out, and now find myself thinking now what? What an I suppose to do now, and when wil it stop hurting so much? Has anyone else felt this way?
I suppose I didn't bargain on the emptiness that would follow all this, a part of me is even angry that I fell so hard!!! Any ideas, thoughts, suggestions or just comment?
perhaps you need not take a break. i just told my best friend i have feelings for her, she is not interested the same way, but after a week we seem to be ok. not perfect but ok. i can't bear the thought of cutting things off with her. so i will deal. if the friendship goes bad on its own so be it - but i am not throwing something away that truly makes me happy. perhaps you should think the same
Hmm...so you are concerned that your relationship is too co dependent and that is why you decided to take a break? Maybe take this time to outline what you would want your relationship to look like, and bring that up for discussion. On the one hand, absence can make the heart grow fonder, but I also would be cautious of going back into this relationship solely out of loneliness. Sounds like this co-dependence is a mutual problem. You might want to work on forming a relationship that is mutually beneficial but also has a lot of breathing room to foster personal growth. This can be a difficult balance to strike. If your friends are all willing to drop out of your life and side with someone else on a controversy such as this, it might be worth considering whether those are truly your friends.
