Well, here is the story of what happened to me: My (kind of) best freind told me his biggest secret and said that now I have to tell him MY secret (which is, obviously, that I'm gay) he knows when I'm lying because he knows me so well, and I can't make something up because of that. He isn't really supportive to the LGBT community (as far as I know :rolle: ) so i don't want to tell him yet :dry:... He is always asking me what it is and I always deny telling him. I'm sure he won't guess that I'm gay because I told him I had a crush on a girl (a few times) and he's pestering me so much I wanted to scream/shout :tantrum: anyway, he is a reliable person, but at my school people will just find out by "certain people" almost a day after the person told that "certain person" I'm really scared that I'll just turn invisible or that he'll reject me for who I am. He is a nice person i.e. helping with homework or whatever and he is really annoyed at me. :icon_sad: He trusts me with everything and knows just what I'm going to do a few seconds before I do it or just what to say to cheer me up. He says that It's not "balanced" that he told me his secret and I can't. That's pretty much it. Please help me with my problem and feel free to ask me questions about this or anything that you feel you should say. Thanks :icon_bigg
Hmm...there has to be other secrets that are true. Is there any crazy secret from your family, have you ever done something embarrassing you would comfortable with him knowing? At 15 I could say I was obsessed with "butt sex" haha. I had read passages about a guy doing that to a girl in my grandma's western novels. It jerked off to metal music. haha I was still in denial of being a lesbian but these were truths of mine that I could imagine being a big deal possibly in place of the biggest. I also never met my real dad so I could share that. My mom was an alcoholic....hmm i guess these are just getting sad now. It is a bummer you can't be truthful about your sexuality with him but I totally understand how if you don't trust him yet it might not be good.
Tell him you don't want to or aren't ready to tell him! I know my friends would understand if I didn't want to tell them. My friends have told me secrets before and they don't expect me to reciprocate, you shouldn't feel the need to reciprocate. Just say you don't have a secret to tell him right now.
You are under no obligation to tell him anything you're not comfortable with. Have you ever discussed LBGT issues with him to see where he stands? You said you don't think he's supportive of the LGBT community, but are you only assuming that or is it from something he's told you?
Don't be coerced through peer pressure to divulge your secrets! How juvenile! If this is someone you don't trust to be able to keep a secret, they haven't earned the right to learn them! Furthermore, its a childish tactic to try to trade secrets and a kin to guilt tripping or emotional blackmail. Don't put up with this manipulative nonsense. If you must tell him another secret. Or tell him point blank you are not interested in telling him your secrets. This is where you learn how to stand up for yourself and demand respect. People will always try to get you to do the things you want to do. Hopefully it won't take you a lot of painful experiences to learn to stand your ground and tell it like it is.
