Any tips on stopping friends from hitting on me?

Have you told them, or at least insinuated that you aren't really looking for a relationship at these clubs/workshops? These sorts of things are usually the de-facto mating ground for gay people, so you're probably going to be seen as a potential partner unless you make it reasonably clear that's not what you're there for.
They shouldn't take offence as long as you tell them early on - i.e. don't wait until they've invited you on date before you say you're just there for friends, because a lot of people will take that as you just finding an excuse to turn them down.

 

Just be sure to let people know that you're there looking for friends. If you're newly exploring your own sexuality, make that known so hopefully people will give you more space rather than jumping in right away to date you.

 

Well, it is by no means anything bad you are doing - but you have to take things with a grain of salt.

I do not belong to the "friends" group - my goal in life isn't to be friends with a gay guy - it's to find one and date him/be with him. Straight guy friends? Well, sure! Gay guy friends? ehh....

I say this because I just don't see the point. I've never understood it.

Can I just make one other comment? Don't be offended... but where exactly are you going? If you're attractive, you're going to get hit on. It's just that simple. So maybe you need to look at how you're handling the situation and go from there. Do guys you meet at clubs really make "friend" material? "yeah, I'm at this club and I'm here to talk about my dog - not get drunk and have sex." Think about where you are and the context of the environment.

 

I think you're right about having gay friends and by extension a support network. Besides they are more likely to have gay friends or friends of friends, etc. all to the better to increase your chances of meeting that special guy. You are right to insist on friendship first, so the trick is to signal that early on in any interactions you have in these places.

 

The fact that you're getting slobbery text messages means you're giving them your phone number. And this before you're truly aware of where they're headed. The smart move would be not to give out your phone number to somebody until you're both clear what page you're on. If some guy saddles up to you and hands you his phone number in a bar, it's not because he thinks you'd make a great friend - people generally don't operate that way. So when you meet people, just interact with them for a while, and make it clear what you're interested in, and what you're not interested in.

Lex

 

Yeah, I think you are looking for friends in the wrong arena, and not letting them know early on that you are not interested in something else than friendship. For friends, your local LGBT group/organization can be great for meeting LGBT friends. And whether it is a transman or a bisexual woman, you`ll be surprised at how well you can hit it off, and develop life-long friendships. My friend is in our LGBT organization, and she has transmen, transwomen, other lesbians, some gay guys, and others in her circle of friends, and I love hanging with them. You can trade LGBT jokes, discuss LGBT issues as well as everyday things you could just as well talk about with your straight buddies. Meeting someone in a bar, it is less chance for them being open for getting new friends, unless they make it clear that they are in a relationship and not interested. Then you can do the hand-shake, and let them know you are simply building an LGBT network, and you want more like-minded friends. That`s the best way of doing it, I think.

 

Run out of the building screaming. That should do it.