Reached critical point with my family.

I guess everything will be over this year, otherwise I don't think I'll have any hope anymore.

Whether it will be a good ending, or a bad ending, only time will tell. I received threats to my life, coming from my dad, yesterday. Although I knew I was not safe here since the beginning, that was my final conviction.

He said he would shoot me if he saw me with a guy, and that he would shoot down the other person too. With all words. I had received similar threats before but not with this tone or this specific. Previously, he had said he would act against anyone I supposedly bring home, which would be accounted as an "invasion", so he kind of didn't commit a crime saying that, well, now he did. I never, EVER said I would bring anyone home to begin with.

He also threatened to cut my College funding, but he knows he can't do that because I am his dependent and he proved he can finance it by allowing me in. They can't expel me from home because this is my home too. He is looking for a way to deliberately get hid of me, I know it. All because I am a "fag"

Back to the point. I'm 17, in College (College's in Brazil have no lodging) and I have no money. I don't have many options, but I will try my best to keep myself safe and leave this house. I sent an email to the University's psychological accompaniment program telling I needed guidance and explaining I was receiving threats to my life, and I'll have a consultation this week. Monday, probably. I'm afraid about the outcome of this, but I am feeling threatened so I'm not shutting my mouth.

Then I analyzed my options. I have rights on this apartment, and my parents do as well, equally. I was thinking about legally propose them to buy my part. That would be my University's financing, then I could maintain myself with the rest for the time I look for a job.

For that I'll need a lawyer, and I'll need to be an adult too, obviously. So I can't act until I am 18.

I am afraid of doing this, I'm feeling lost at some point, but I am not staying here. I have to keep my sanity, and I will not tolerate this kind of conduct towards me like if if I was an object destitute of rights.

For now, all my hope lies on that counseling. Its that or nothing.

My parents, and my family are pronounced homophobes that want me dead or out of their views. I don't love them anymore but I will give them just what they want, I will disappear.

I may be dramatic, but I know what I heard and I don't want a bullet on my head nor third parties killed because of me. If he thinks there are no consequences for saying that, he is very wrong and I will prove it. I will pave my way with the resources a 17'r old college student has, but it will be a damn good road.