Okay so me and my ex met each other online on may 13th..... She emailed me through "yahoo answers" asking if she could help because i was posting questions since i was questioning my sexuality and so her user name said "vee" and she said her name was "violet" so what i didn't know was that, her real name was scarlett....but she never told me that.....she said said it was violet and over the summer up until august, i believed but then i found out the truth.....NOW....during the middle of July ...she did try to tell she had been lying to me....but i brushed off but eventually found out anyways....so after i found out, she had been lying to me, we cut off ties to each other for a week but i wanted her to confess because she never confessed so finally she did confess in September and she tried to cut off ties with me because SHE thought it was what was best and it was but for some reason, i didn't want that to happen.....for some reason, i still wanted her in my life so then we decided to continue talking....and so during the 3 extra months , we continued talking, i was struggling with her ...because i didn't trust her, i would get angry at her whenever i thought she was lying or something and it would scare. I went into panic mode....and researched her to make sure she wasn't lying about who she was again...and i found out she WAS who she said she was. she wasn't lying about her name, she wasn't lying about where she was from or anything.... but i wanted to make sure she was telling the truth so i decided to Skype with her one night and it confirmed she was real and she wasn't a pedophile. but during those 3 months in the summer , i ended up dating her for a week but she cut it off because she was trying to tell me she was lying to me. but in October, i swore to myself....i wasn't going to have feelings for her again but it started all over again and i kept holding it inside and so finally let it out. i told her my feelings and we discussed if she had feelings for me back ...and i ended up getting mad and she didn't respond to me for a month and i was heartbroken then she came back to tell me why she left and said it was best if we just stayed apart.... but then half a month later, i found out something and wrote her an angry email and we emailed each other back and forth but then she confessed during the time, she let me go...she missed me like crazy and she let go because she thought that was what was best but it tore us both up. in the time, i was gone, she was working on some issues, she had going on so anyways, were still talking ....and the thing is that my sister and dad knew about how she lied about who she was..... my sister found about scarlett during the summer but only knew her name was "violet" then , i told her something and she found out her real name but then proceeded to tell my WHOLE FAMILY and my dad and sister told me not to talk to her anymore.....but obviously i didn't listen i do understand, they were looking out for me...do not get me wrong here. i do appreciate what they di and i know i should have listened but ...i just didn't want to let her go, i guess.....but eventually i did for almost 2 months and it sucked. i cried most days and nights anyways, i dont have to worry about my dad but my sister is the one to worry about every time my sister is coming home to visit. i have to - change all passwords to my accounts - change computer password - delete history - use my other email address - stay by her side most of the time - log out of my Skype account and into the other one - double check my passwords' - double check browsing history - delete her contact my sister once was coming down for Christmas and had to plan a month before her arrival. i had to practice lying because my sister always ask me if im still talking to her i had to make sure, the browsing history was deleted i had do a bunch of stuff to make sure she didn't find out about scarlett but INSTEAD, my dad found out , i go on EC and told my sister then she proceeded to visit the website and try to look up my profile so then i had to delete my account to make sure she didn't find it. i DO UNDERSTAND she is looking out for me but you must also understand....she's a control freak. ever since my mother died, she's always had to have control over me and its pissed me off.. yes i was stupid to continue to talking to scarlett but if i didn't continue talking to her, i would have never gotten to skype with her and all the other stuff we've been through together. i've forgiven scarlett for what she lied and about and it wasn't until she decided to stay that she decided to forgive herself. we've skyped 3 or 4 times now so.. anyways my question is.....how do I continue to keep her a secret? its really hard because we have to Skype at night due to our schedules and my room is next to my dads room so i have to whisper....but we once skyped for 4 hours straight but how do i continue to keep her a secret without my dad or sister finding out? me and scarlett have been through a lot and i dont think it would be fair for us to give up and go our separate ways for the 4th time. we tried to go our seperate ways but it just tore us apart in the end
I do believe your sister has cause for concern. You are very young, and there of lots of people out there out to prey on kids. I dont imagine your sister has skyped with her or talked to her personally. So can you really blame her? While I assume you may think she's a control freak in other ways, I think she could be justified on this one. This is just my opinion. By the way, how old is violet? or how old does she claim to be? Also, trust is really important in a relationship. If you think she's lying to you at every corner, there isnt much of a relationship. She is armed with a bit of anonymity (even if you have skyped with her.) since this relationship is online. Personally, that would be a deal breaker for me.
you got the whole thing wrong first off.... her real name is scarlett.....but for 3 months she said she was violet..... and i know she is scarlett......believe me...when i say this....i have done TON of research, i got plenty of information on her....she is scarlett.....i know it seems hard to believe ...but the information, i have is....definitely true....she is SCARLETT. i know a lot of stuff about her...she isn't lying.... i have no doubt she isn't lying about who she is ... and i do trust her, i trust her now...its just after i found out she lied, i got really paranoid and didn't trust ANYONE and she says she's 16 and she is 16.....in fact....i'm technically older than her by a month the one thing, i want people to understand is that she IS real.... i understand, she lied once about who she was but ....its hard to explain, because i know the situation better
It may very well be true that you do know quite a lot about her now, and that she is who she says she is. But I still think there's definitely some cause for concern here because she lied to you about what her name was for three entire months. What good reason would she ever have to do that? It strikes me as manipulative and a surefire sign that you shouldn't trust her, even if she is telling the truth now. So, honestly, (even if your sister is really controlling and nosy in general--that's another matter in itself) your dad and sister are right. She doesn't sound good for you and having to go to such great lengths to keep it a secret from everyone is sometimes a sign that it's probably not healthy.
look, i mentioned this i think.....she tried to leave during the middle of the summer (in july) and actually told me she was lying to me and that i didn't deserve it but i brushed it off.. she kept trying to tell but ignored her. and look.....i understand...all that shit, not healthy...blah blah....but seriously....she has made my life better....she's help me bring up my grades, brought up my confidence and everything else and another thing...i should not trust her and i didn't for 5 months i didn't trust her but i had to let it go..... and another thing, she explained to me, she was very sick at the time and now has gotten better. she got a therapist after she told she was lying
