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I'm obsessed with my straight best friend

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Jayboy999, Mar 11, 2013.

  1. Jayboy999

    Regular Member

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    So this is going to be long but I need it to be descriptive. I met this guy freshman year high school. We didn't talk much but he initially wanted to become closer and stuff. I always thought he was extremely attractive. As does everyone else. We are the typical mainstream teen boys. We have a lot of guy friends. We are all generally good looking. But me and the guy always hang out alone now. We are the closest friends. The first time I thought he might be gay was when we were at his house and he got in a akward position with me on the couch. Like he was behind me and I was in front . He even asked if it was ok I said sure. Then sophomore year summer we would always hang out and smoke weed alone together and one night after smoking we sat outside and he rested his head on my shoulder and we just sat. And whenever we watch movies together we sit close together and I put my head on his chest and he puts his arm over me and we sometimes play with eachother hands. We actually kind of held hands last weekend. We were alone and in his room all dark watching a movie and we were sitting in that same position then i jokingly told him to shut up and he playfully choked me and I grabbed his hand and put it on my stomach and held it there. We didn't talk bout it. We just sat with my hand on his and my head on his chest. Then he said "wtf stop holding my hand" I laughed then the same thing happened twice more till the end of the movie. Another time we were about to sleep and my hand was hanging off the bed and I reached for his and held it as we talked. He always pretends not to notice. And if its a scary movie ill squeeze his biceps and stuff . We also wrestle and he holds me down and smiles and looks me in the eyes. His other really good friend came out then said he was straight again but they don't hang out anymore. Also my best friend says he likes this girl a lot and the kind of had a thing but I don't even know if they really have or not. He has never had a girlfriend or gone more than kissing. He claims to have gotten a bj at a party but no one thinks so. It's a longer story in its own. He plays basketball sometimes and loves sports and every single girl likes us . Like girls are obsessed with both of us but we don't do anything with anyone. He doesn't like talking to me a lot on the phone or text and can go a long time without texting. We see eachother every week cuz I forcefully make plans lol.we recently fight a lot and make up. I always fight him about not wanting to text or make plans and stuff and he says I'm just like the other guys and he doesn't always have to see me. One time in all explamation marks he texted "IM NOT YOUR BOYFRIND" but we always make up and stuff like minutes after we fight. We are both "straight" both "talk about girls" but not a lot. He always says "this guys is ridiculously good looking " and says brads Pitt is his idle. He once said along time ago "being with a girl is like a chore" the he took it back. When I moved back from Vegas recently I was at his house and was standing near his bed and he grabbed me and through me on his bed and wrapped his legs around me and kissed my neck and said dam I miss u. But he jokes a lot and always makes fun of me jokingly and calls me his pet"sloth" lol. He walks like a straight guys and talks like one and we are persain so our backgrounds are completely against being gay. I'm so confused if he is gay or not cuz of all this and I always think about him and the fighting is almost everyday but I promised to stop.and I don't know how to tell him I'm gay or if I should make a movie or not and I always almost see him naked and it kills me. I can't keep doing this unless I know he could be bi or gay . We always hug eachother and nuzzled eachother and I just need HELP WITH THIS GUY. Btw we are juniors . And did I mention he is so attractive he could be a model like our straight friend are confused as to why we both don't get with a lot of girls. He is so perfect it's crazy like he is better looking than any celebrity I know smh .
     
  2. asmith6543

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    Do you think religion/culture plays a role into why he won't take girls to another level? Maybe he feels like its a little too far from his comfort level. I imagine you both are mostly westernized, but maybe to a certain extent he's holding on to those "Persian" values? (I'm guessing they are more on the traditional side). I dont know the answer to these questions, so maybe you can elaborate to help clarify that aspect of it.

    I think you need to accept when he says he is straight. Although, maybe you can ask him whats up, wtf are you doing if you are straight, cuz it isnt normal behavior when he's with you.
     
  3. Jayboy999

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    He smokes and drinks and he really isn't that Muslim I guess. He is very open and I think he would have told me I think

    ---------- Post added 11th Mar 2013 at 02:39 PM ----------

    It's frowned upon to show such actions toward one another which is why it's hard for me to be open

    ---------- Post added 11th Mar 2013 at 02:45 PM ----------

    Oh and my family doesn't like him because they all think he is gay by how he acts and his accent in farsi. It puts pressure on me I guess

    ---------- Post added 11th Mar 2013 at 02:46 PM ----------

    Oh and my family doesn't like him because they all think he is gay by how he acts and his accent in farsi. It puts pressure on me I guess
     
  4. lman

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    I have the same problem. My friend has even jokingly said the i'm not your boyfriend thing. I think the best thing to do would be try to get over your feelings for him unless you plan to tell him about yourself. I know both of them won't be easy things to do(I can't do it), but hoping something will happen day after day is extremely painful emotionally. The longing for you to want him to know how you feel will only worsen.

    ---------- Post added 11th Mar 2013 at 07:15 PM ----------

    http://emptyclosets.com/forum/famil...-bisexual-friend-trouble-pls-give-advice.html I posted on here not too long ago
     
  5. Jerk88

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    I've been friends with a guy named Esteban for almost a year. We're both 24 (I'll be 25 on September 15th he'll be 25 on November 1st). I found him alone texting on his iPhone last August. I introduced myself to him and told him I was gay. He's bisexual but had a girl at the time. We started hanging out and talking. He asked me out of clear blue if I was seeing somebody I said no. I asked him why, he said he had feelings for me and was tearful about it. I was like wow. I hugged him and told that I care for him too. About a month later the line between friendship and romance was blurred when we had sex for the first time but that's a different story. We call eachother all the time when we're lonely. I love him deeply it makes me cry sometimes.