I met a sweet and very, very quiet guy this Friday, we just went out for coffee and cake. He was quiet, to the point of self-effacing, so I did most of the talking (fortunately with what is going on in my life at present there is much to talk about). But getting him to talk was like pulling teeth... I have stated elsewhere that I have adopted the "friendship first" philosophy when dating (as suggested here at EC in various posts). I think it is a good policy, but online dating does bring with it certain...expectations...at least at the beginning. I was quite clear with him that this is how I wanted to proceed, and nothing further happened. He stated later that he enjoyed himself and wanted to keep in touch, but of course, both of us know what we are looking for: the possibility of a relationship. I don't think I am attracted to him, but my adherence to friendship first puts me in an awkward situation. I am putting the question out there: if I pursue this friendship, do I run the risk of leading him on? Should I be clear with him right from the start that I don't think a relationship will happen, or should I give it more time to allow for the possibility that, by knowing him more, I could possibly change my mind? Adolescent-confusion time folks!
Yes, be blunt with him! "I want to be friends, but nothing more will happen". I hate how bad guys communicate. I don't have that problem obvously being Cancer and female. June
