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my situation in my "amazing" sophmore year

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by heywhatsup, Apr 17, 2013.

  1. heywhatsup

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    Hi guys, i'm new to this site but i just really need advice since i cant deal with this anymore. Hope i can get some advice thanks!

    So there is this guy in my school who ive been major crushing on for about two years and in the beginning of the year we started to talk and i went over his house to do school project but i was kinda shy/nervous around him because i started to have major feelings for him. I honestly do think hes gay but in middle school he had a couple of gfs but now he's 16 and says that he likes a girl named ****. He has a very feminine build and he has the "gay" accent as well. He is also very social and flamboyant and also is VERY VERY into theatre. He does all the plays and outside of school and everything. He's also VERY into his christian youth group where hes highly active and he goes on retreats and such. He mostly talks to girls and he's super comfortable around girls. He's in show choir and hes very into music and drama and idk i just have a gay vibe from him and hes super sassy too. He knows all the lyrics to all the broadway shows and the pop songs and he loves to put on a show. He's an amazing dancer and he always is just extremely flamboyant and giggly. He usually wears tight pants to and he has the bluest eyes. He also wears a lot of v necks and bright colors. His outfits always match but he doesn't dress like a stereotypical gay person. I also heard that he was bullied alot im middle school for being "gay" but people would call him that and i think that couldve repressed his sexuality. But again what if he is secretly gay and just doesnt like me at all. confused all the time

    After months of being just friendly acquaintances i guess i told my close girl friend that i really really liked him and he was the only person i would ever want to date. I think i might be in love with him. He always smiles at people and it always makes my day. Hes also an amazing singer and i get very sexually frustrated when he sings because its like angels lol.

    Well someone told him that i liked him a lot and then from that point on he COMPLETELY started to ignore me and stop talking to me. like everything changed and he would try to avoid me and then he started to tell literally everyone in the school that i liked him. and one day i just texted him and said "im sorry". and he was just "its okay you cant control who you have feelings for but im straight". no more texts from then on or talking or anything. It has been 2 months now. I didnt know he followd me on twitter so randomly i would tweet "i love you so much" or "when i see you i just smile" or whatever many tweets like that but i didnt mention his name. His friend showed him my tweets and then he unfollowed me. since he hasnt talked to me about it at all jus we wanted to ignore everything from the start, i got my friend to talk t him. but he didnt say much. She asked why is this so weird for you and he said that i just creep him out. i honestly dont think he cares at all about me. he even told my teachers and that "if i pursued him more, {he} would go to guidance" He gets so overdramatic about everything and its just so confusing. And its stupid of me to belive that i still may have a chance with him.

    Alongside that my other girl friend had a crush on him as well and he found out and he started to text her ALOT, with many smileys and emojis and pics and like it was super girly and cute. He told her that he liked her and wanted to get to know her more but its been a month and he hasn't asked her out at all. He still is friendly with er and talks to her a lot but she feels really sad that he hasn't asked her out and she told me that we need to find out his sexuality since he seems unstable. In october he asked out this other girl and she denied and apparently he doesn't have feelings for her but honestly i cane see him liking a girl i don't know why. I still feel he's not comfortable with his sexuality or maybe he doesn't even know yet.

    MANY people think he's gay but hasn't realized it yet. Like everyone says that he's gay from what they've seen in middle school and i just still think he might realize it sometime. Everyone now knows and they tell me i still have a chance but maybe he does know he's gay but is hiding it and that means he doesn't like me? im just so confused about this and not talking to him for two months is literally killing me and i still see him and he's being just so great around all of his friends but me. I wish i can talk to him about this but i feel that he's just get really uncomfortable since he saw my tweets and i NEVER even wanted him to know so thanks for my friend telling him. I was thinking of telling him myself, in private and maybe he'd react differently but oh well i have to deal with the fact that someone told him and that he says that he's "straight" even though his behavior and everything confuses me and many people. Thanks for taking the time to read this :slight_smile: Please ask as many questions as possible! and write back too thanks again :icon_bigg

    ---------- Post added 17th Apr 2013 at 08:20 PM ----------

    i have sceencaps of convos with him and other people regarding this situation but idk if i should post them for privacy reasons. but i think they could help analyze this more.
     
    #1 heywhatsup, Apr 17, 2013
    Last edited: Apr 17, 2013
  2. Dakine

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    I know this is a hard situation but for your mental and emotional health, you need to try to get over this person. If he can't deal with the fact you like him, whether in fact it's cause it creeps him out or if its because he's in denial, either way, you are in the best years of your life, don't let someone else's baggage hold you back from better things to come.
     
  3. Aeriestars

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    I don't understand why you're so obsessed whether he's gay or not? If he is, he doesn't want to be out - so get over it. Let him do what he's doing, drop it. The worst part of being gay (imo) is when you yourself aren't quite comfortable with it yet, and everyone is trying to force it out of you before you figure everything out and are ready.
     
  4. robclem21

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    This guy sounds like bad news. I am sorry but I have to agree with the two posters above. Regardless of whether he is gay or not (which up until this reason I don't see any evidence that really makes me think he is), he clearly is not ready to be in a relationship with anybody. Just how gay guys can have hobbies that don't make them seem gay at all, straight guys can have hobbies that make them seem gay. When a guy tells you repeatedly they are straight and go through these lengths to not talk to you, whether they are honest or not doesn't even matter. It isn't someone you should be spending your time chasing.

    I remember a lot of circumstances like this from when I was in high school with guys who acted very similar and none of them ever worked out. Some guys are months, and years away from being comfortable with who they are and if you want to spend your high school years being heartbroken and upset waiting, then you are going down the right path. Move on, find someone who will be able to return your feelings and appreciate you. You will find it is much more rewarding and healthy.

    Also, I am sorry he spread everything around your school. I find that happens too with overly dramatic guys. It carries into all aspects of their social lives as well, which IMO is really unfortunate because the situation between you two could have been handled much more maturely. Again though, at 16, live and learn.