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In love with straight bff

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by kesmi, Apr 22, 2013.

  1. kesmi

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    I am in love, crazy in love, with my best straight friends, I just cant stop thinking about him, I always cry when I think I can't marry him. But I'm not sure if he is straight, because I'm straight too, since I'm haven't came out yet, but this can be just my head thinking wrong stuff for my own good!

    What should I do? Will I forget him if he is really straight? because he is my only and true love, I would marry him and never be with another men!

    Thanks already!!
     
  2. clarkec1

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    I know what your going through. Firstly, would you sacrifice a friendship? If you would then consider the consequences. Is it worth it? Try to make sure that he is gay to start with, you could come out to him, and then ask him if he is gay himself. If you tell him you are gay, he might come out to you.

    Be happy that you have got a friendship with him, make the most of it.

    Do what you think is best, we are all behind you, and good luck! :slight_smile:
     
  3. kesmi

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    So, he is my best friend, he is the reason I don't come out, because this way I can be near him, hug him, touch him, and he send me shirtless pics on snapchat hahaha
    So that's the level of my love for him, I don't come out because he is too importante to be lost ://

    Thanks you for responding :slight_smile:
     
  4. warhammer40kgay

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    Come out to him if he hates you forget himyou only know your real friends after you come out to them trust meh
     
  5. kesmi

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    But I don't know if I can forget him, he is my everything, he is the one I imagine having a life with, so I'd rather have his friendship then having to forget him :// I just love him so much, and I would understand if he stopped talking to me, because especially in high school is not ok for a straigh guy to be very close friend of a gay guy, I would want him to be happy and not mocked!

    Thank you for responding!!
     
  6. Dunno

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    If he wouldn't accept you, knowing you're gay, then is it worth it to retain a friendship under false pretenses? This isn't a rhetorical question, as I'm in a very similar situation, and my answer is a strong I don't know.
     
  7. Maddy

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    If you're not prepared to come out to him, how do you expect him to come out to you or have a relationship with you?
     
  8. GhostOfRazgriz

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    I completely understand where you're coming from. Back before I realized I was bisexual, I had a crush on one of my best friends for the longest time. I was head over heels for her for over two years before I finally told her. Then she told me she was homosexual, and it couldn't work out between us.

    At first, I was completely devastated, even though we were still friends. But then I realized that the friendship we already had was so strong, that as best friends, we could rely and trust each other with things we wouldn't tell anyone else, like our sexualities.

    So even though we couldn't get married, which was my dream, we still maintain such a strong friendship. We rely on each other and we are like siblings. So even if you can't be with the person you love like a spouse, you can be like his brother. And since you are BFF's I assume you do share a strong friendship.

    But I digress, I'll get to the point. Even after having my heart broken and my dreams crushed, I don't regret telling her. The bond I share with my friend became stronger, even if it wasn't that between lovers. Although coming out at the same time will make it tougher, I feel telling him is the right thing to do, because you need closure on this,