Well today and yesterday I have seen my crush quite a few times more than usual. And I have noticed that he is making quite a few brief glances at me. Once, when me and my best mate were walking past him, he appeared to be trying to get closer to me. And today when I was waiting to go into my last lesson, he walked right past me and got slightly closer again, and he also made a brief glance at me. That might mean nothing, but never mind... Anyway, I am starting to think that he may have developed a slight interest in me, but I'm not sure at all. There have been other situations where he looked at me and made subtle yet unlikely moves to show his interest in me, but I'm not going to say them all. Please don't make a comment on this though, because I'll probably end up getting upset or something. That was just to tell you why I am posting this thread. So, I am in year 9, and he is in year 7. Please don't comment on whether or not we know each other either. Basically, I want to know if it might seem slightly unusual for a year 9 to be going out with out a year 7. Please note that grades are different from years. I think that a grade is 1 year wither younger or older than a year, if that makes sense. For example, I am in year 9 in England, but if I lived in America or something I would be in either grade 8 or 10. I don't know whether that makes a difference, but I thought I better point it out. I'm not jumping to conclusions saying that us two are going to go out, but I think it would be best to know in advance. Everybody else I have told say that me going out with year 7 is fine. They say that as long as I love him, and he loves me, age doesn't matter. I think that's nice of them. So thanks for listen to my very long question, and once again please avoid commenting on the relationship between us itself, unless you think it would improve your response. And please give honest answers, I've created a poll on your opinions too. Thanks in Advance!
It depends... in our school you would have the mick taken out of you badly. Not just for being in a same-sex relationship but for being in a relationship with a year 7. You might not care what people think but this young lad might. When I was in year 7 I was really self-conscious and people made it worse and now I've got really low self-confidence. He might get affected a lot by this if something happens. For example on getting the piss taken out of you: my friend went out with a year 7 last year when we was in year 8 and everybody took the piss and he ended up dumping her. I know it's pathetic and immature but it's just what people are like.
The difference of two years between year 9 and year 7 can be significant, but can be workable. It's about the outer edge of what I'd feel would be reasonable at your age. As people get into their upper teens and early 20s, then a bit of a longer age gap can be reasonable, somewhere between probably 3 and 5 years typically. Once you get to the late 20s and beyond, the age gap tends to matter less. What's more important than the specific age gap is the relative balance of power between the two people. Age does play a large factor in this, but it's not the only deciding factor. For example, a well-to-do mid-twentysomething founder of a dotcom could conceivably be in a healthy relationship with someone much older, as the power and control issues would be somewhat balanced out by the income and experience of the younger person. But those situations are atypical, and the common problem with age-gap relationships, statistically, is there's an enormous imbalance of power as a result of income, life experience, wisdom, and other factors that make it difficult for it to be healthy. There are, of course, exceptions to the rule, but they are exceptions and so on the whole, large age gaps do not generally result in emotionally healthy relationships, particularly for the younger person.
