there's somebody you like (of the same sex as you), you've been or are becoming friends with them but don't know if they're gay? Do you come out to them? Do you show them you're interested? Do you ask them out on a date? What are the steps that you take or would take? I'm asking because I have a huge crush on this girl that I met 2 weeks ago but I don't know what to do. I was on the verge of coming out to her last time we met but then I lost courage and didn't I'm losing sleep over this, it's driving me nuts. I haven't had such strong feelings for someone for so long. The problem is that she's from overseas and will go back to her country in about 3.5 months... :/ :help:
So, get on with it... Just come out to her first, see how she reacts. According to the reaction you can tell her you have feelings for her. If you miss your chance, you'll be sorry for ever.
Did she give you any sign that she likes girls ? Or that she feels something for you? I think you should come out to her. but you have to be prepared for a bad reaction or a neutral straight reaction, what i mean by that is she can say she dont mind but she will make sure to show you shes straight.And the fact that shes from overseas its something thats very personal i mean there are people who can do long distance relationships and there are people that cant. Picture yourself on that situation and see you think you would feel.
She's going home in three.five months, I'd say forget it. If you're troubled with it now, imagine how hard it's going to be if she is gay and you guys start some fantastic relationship. It's only going to last so long. Just be friends.
Thanks for your responses. I can't decide between going for it or just leaving it. :bang: Not really. But then again I can never tell. And she's Japanese so it's even harder to tell! Out of all my Japanese female friends, she comes across as the least girly, even slightly boyish (short hair, no make-up, boyish clothes), which doesn't mean anything but I can't help but think that may be she's gay - she just happens to be my type :rolle: I think my first step will be to come out to her then... I'm also interested to know what YOU guys do in situations like these, out of curiosity. When you like someone of the same sex, do you pursue them and if so, how?
O boy, Japanese. My boyfriend went to Tokyo on several occasions and said he got totally confused cause many "boys" turned out to be girls. Well I never did, too shy, So it's hard to tell. If I was really crazy over him and he was to go away in a few months I'd risk it, just because of the fact that if it doesn't work out you don't have to deal with it for long. I never thought about the other side of it, which is mentioned. What if it does and you have to say goodbye after a few months? My parents actually helped to get my boyfriend, cause they asked him to sit with us after I pointed him out. It was quite clear he was gay though, flirting with the barman and all. This was in a holiday situation and we were heartbroken that we had to say goodbye after two weeks. But as it happens, my parents discussed the situation and he came over for X-mas and since he lost his home because he was in therapy and broke up with his ex before that, they said he could move in, and he did. So we had a happy ending, but I can imagine that moving in is not always an option and longdistance relations can be complicated. So yeah it also makes sense to not persue it, but hey, I don't know how strong your feelings are, but if they keep you awake at night, something should be done, I'd think.
Oh what, really!? He must've gone to one of those bars where female waiters are dressed as boys, surely :LOL: Right, true. So either way has its pros and cons. If something were to happen, at least Japan is close to Australia and I speak the language :icon_wink But yeah, the long distance would suck. Wow, that's cool. That's a great story!
He was talking about "guys" he met in a park. Okay, speaking the language and the possiblitity to go there cause it is close makes things a bit easier if you would really get involved. And how about trying to find a job there?
I think that you should come out to her. Leave it a while. Tell how how you feel, and go on from there. Keep in mind that she will only be with you for the next 3 and a half months, so you better gets move on!
Hmm, right... interesting. :dry: It wouldn't be too bad as I'm self-employed, but that's going a bit too far. I haven't thought that much ahead! :lol: Yep, you're right...
First i come out. but thats not only to people i like to everyone. And i dont take a long time after meeting the person to do so. It avoids all the pain that i used to go through when i only come out aftrr getting attached to someone.Most people have stopped talking to me or started avoiding me. So if the person rejects me when i dont know them for a long time i dont feel much pain. Second i let things go with the flow. i mean i try to be with the person the most i can and if the feeling is mutual things will happen naturally i try not to rush things. I hope things worked for you and her. Ps. im sorry for taking so long to answer
