Please tell me normal people aren't like this...

A lot of people act this way when they don't know many LBGT people, or don't know them well. I think they'll get over it in time

 

The basic issue (straight guys thinking any and all gay guys must be into them) is actually pretty common. However, most guys (in my experience anyway) will take an assurance that you're not into them at face value and just move on. Then again, most of my experience with this was in college (didn't even know I was gay at your age). I suspect some of what you're seeing is a result of the young age/lack of maturity/lack of experience of the folks involved and some is a result of being in a very conservative area that doesn't have much real world exposure to gay people.

Ways you might address this based on my experience (note YMMV):

a) Tell them you have better uses for your time then messing around with straight guys. If they question this, ask them why you would possibly want to do anything with someone who was straight and so wouldn't enjoy it by definition.

b) Tell them they are not your type. This probably gets more complicated if there are so many types that by process of elimination someone is going to think they are your type. It may also lead to questions or speculation about what your type actually is then.

c) Just say you don't find them attractive/aren't into them (this often results in a response of 'What!? Why not?'. Don't ask me why but it's surprisingly consistent as responses go).

d) Point out that just like they wouldn't want to force/trick someone to do anything with them, you would never want to force or trick anyone into doing anything with you.

e) If the opportunity arises, point out that they should be happy that you're not into girls, because you're one less guy they have to compete with. Also, it seems to be some sort of straight guy conventional wisdom that gay guys attract lots of beautiful women who the straight guys might then pick up. No idea if you can use that to your advantage, but another data point to add.

Unfortunately, I don't know of any way of communicating that you aren't going to attack them except on an individual or small group basis. Bear in mind also that they may be getting a lot of negative info about gay people (and especially gay men) from their parents or elsewhere and that is creating conflict in their heads with their experience of you. That they are apparently treating you as a friend as much as they are may actually say something pretty positive about them. They are young, insecure, and still figuring out this whole sexuality thing themselves, after all. It may be that at least they are trying and are taking their personal knowledge of you as a friend over whatever they may be hearing elsewhere.

Which I guess leads to the final option I can think of:

Be a standup guy and demonstrate through your actions and words as best you can that they have nothing to worry about. Debunk the stereotypes where you can, and make option (d) above a point of honor. Take the moral high ground so to speak. Hopefully, in time, they will get the message and learn to relax around you again.

Then again, you could get a bullhorn and yell I DON'T WANT YOU, at all of them. It would certainly get their attention and might be funny enough that they would laugh and relax a bit. But you certainly know them better than I do.

My 2c worth,

Todd

 

One guy I worked with used to give me this routine. I finally jokingly said "A crush on you? Ew. I'd rather go straight." He then got offended and asked what was wrong with him. I said "Vance, you can't be offended because you think I have a crush on you...and then be offended again when you find out I don't. Either/or, dude."

Lex

 

The best thing you can do, I think is make a joke out of it and mock them a bit for their own insecurity.

When you're with them one on one, point out a particularly ugly woman. A woman that you know they'd NEVER have sex with. "I need a straight guy's opinion. Would you have sex with that woman over there?" *wait for reaction then laugh* "Oh? Wow. That's kinda how I feel about having sex with you."

If you find out one of your friends thinks this, confront them on it. "Really, dude? You think I'm into you? Seriously? The thought of hooking up with you makes me almost turn straight."

Wait until one of your friends points out a hot girl or something, then laugh at him. "You should lower your expectations, man. I mean, seriously, you <insert friendly insult such as: "you smell like a week old urinal puck, I can't even imagine hooking up with you without gagging - and not in the way I'd usually like to be gagging, either.">."

Of course, this all depends on your friendship and the individuals in question. You don't want to actually insult anyone, just let it be known how you find them generally unappealing sexually or romantically.

However, honestly this all comes from their own insecurities. It has nothing to do with you. Most of them are probably just afraid that if you like them that people might consider them gay as well. Which brings along all the same feelings and concerns people have when they're closeted. (Not that they're closeted, mind you, just the general feeling of 'OMG, OMG, OMG! What will people think / how will people treat me?!')

 

I like Alderick's idea... Funny and to the point..
I'm not surprised that your mates think that... A lot of gay peeps have crushes on their friends you'll see these threads soon if you haven't already.

I'm not out to any of my mates nor look at them in that way. But if I was out I'd be doing something that Aldrick suggested or just get my fling to come meet them ...