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Feeling a bit guilty...

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Gipsy, May 16, 2013.

  1. Gipsy

    Full Member

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    Location:
    Florida
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
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    Some people
    Okay, well let me start off that I'm female, with some other gender identities but in the real world that doesn't make me any less physically female. Okay well, I started recently liking this girl (well I have for a while, just not as much as now) and she found out yesterday that I liked her because my punkass friend told her friend and then her friend told her. And I catch her staring at me sometimes...but anyway that's not the point. The point relates to my family. So I told my mom about the person I liked and I told her this whole situation. But I made a little twist to the story -- I mentioned to her "he"/"him" instead of "she"/"her"..and then she gives me some advice, and using the male pronouns..and I kinda feel guilty, because she thinks I'm straight and so does my dad but he's on a business trip at the moment.

    I don't know if my family is homophobic, I don't believe so since they don't make a big deal about gays whenever the subject is randomly brought up. Though that doesn't change the fact that I'm feeling guilty. As a matter of fact, a few years back they found out over a profile over the internet that I'm interested in girls too, but I came to convince them later on that it was all just a phase...but I lied to myself, and I lied to them too..just to keep things "cool" and "low" with them. That was a stupid mistake, because if I come out to them now not only will I feel more guilty, but also feel like they won't believe me because I told them it was a phase once, now they might think I'm going through that "phase" again.

    I will be honest that there are times when I still question my sexuality, but then again I've had an attraction for females differently when I was younger, and it only got stronger as I grew. I'm still in doubt that it's a phase, because the way I'd feel about guys is the same way I'd feel with a girl. Aside from that, what do I do with all that guilt piled up on me? I really don't plan to come out to them anytime soon..maybe when I show them how much I like/love a girl, and they'll get suspicious..but without mentioning it.. :confused:
     
  2. Enchanted Mark

    Regular Member

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    Hello Fedimex!

    You should talk to your parents and bring up a conversation on LGBT and see if they support it or dislike it. This is a way to find out if they are homophobic or not. If they support LGBT tell them that your interested in the girl, but do not tell them right away. Besides, if they do support it you will feel more comfortable coming out.

    Its okay to feel guilty. Everyone lies at some point. If your parents don't believe you, tell them you are being serious.

    Good Luck and hope everything works out the way you planned! :thumbsup: