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Another Bad Day... Is it really Worth it?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by clarkec1, May 23, 2013.

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  1. clarkec1

    clarkec1 Guest

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    This contains bad, but necessary language, sorry.

    So today my crush wasn't in school today, again. I really wanted to see him, but I wasn't that desperate to see him. My friend has this girl that he occasionally talks to, and he told her that I fancy my crush's sister, which I obviously don't, and he knows it. So the girl went up to her and said that I fancy her, and she turned around and and looked at me with her mouth wide open. I started shaking my head and walked away with my mate.

    The girl that my friend knows followed us and said do you really like her, and I said no I like her brother. She seemed shocked (everybody I tell doesn't believe me) and then she told my crush's sister that I fancy her brother. She then told me that her response was "Fuck off, leave me alone, he's straight". And that sums it up. Another bad day for me.

    I just can't live like this for much longer, I am upset, confused, distraught, angry, and simply... Sad. I want to post this in every forum, if there was a forum called "Forum for people that are distraught, feel as though there life is not working out and never will work out, and just want all their sadness and upset to stop", then I would post this in there.

    Firstly, if we do go out, I would not have the best relationship with his sister, secondly, she said he's straight, thirdly, all of these little bad negative things all add up to a terrible life. I just want it to stop! :tears:

    What's wrong with me!? Am I mental? Crazy? I am certain that something is happening, I don't know whether it's just a very big phase of stress in my life, or I'm going through a nervous breakdown, or I'm actually,my developing a mental problem. Call me over reactive, but I haven't mentioned the half of it. I have days like this more and more often and they're really fucking (sorry, but I had to say it) me off! I am never completely happy, every aspect of my life is somehow intertwined with sadness. Why should I be sad and have a bad fucking life, and every body else be happy!? Why me!!! I know I haven't got the worst life in the world, far from it, but it is BAD. Please don't tell me to "appreciate what I've got", or to "Be grateful for everything", because I'm not really in the mood for it. And don't say that other's lives are just as bad, because I can assure you that they are not as bad as mine!

    The only person that makes me happy and picks me up when I'm down is my best friend. How can I make it stop I'm crazy, I'm weird, I need advice!!!

    Just to summarise my opinion on certain people (I hope you read the first line):

    My crush's sister is a complete bitch and she is entirely insensitive.
    I hate everyone apart from my best friend, a few other friends and you guys, and some teachers.
    I want him!

    Even if I can't have him, I want all of this to stop!

    :bang::icon_sad::tears::tears::tears::tears::tears::tears::tears::tears::tears::tears::tears:
     
    #1 clarkec1, May 23, 2013
  2. AKTodd

    AKTodd
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    On iPad, so limited typing ATM, but:

    Your friend seems to have a problem with shooting his mouth off for the purpose of stirring up drama.

    Other than that:

    (*hug*) (*hug*)(*hug*)

    Hang in there man.

    Todd
     
    #2 AKTodd, May 23, 2013
  3. clarkec1

    clarkec1 Guest

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    I appreciate that, but I need advice!
     
    #3 clarkec1, May 23, 2013
  4. Hefiel

    Hefiel
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    You might want to talk to your friend and clear things up so that he doesn't go around saying stupid things that are not true again. To me he seems more like a source of harm than a source of good for you at the moment, so setting things straight would be a good idea. Depending on how you handle it that may affect your friendship however, but I think it's necessary.
     
    #4 Hefiel, May 23, 2013
  5. clarkec1

    clarkec1 Guest

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    Let me make it clearer: I don't care about him, I care about me. Forget about him, what should I do!?
     
    #5 clarkec1, May 23, 2013
  6. DelFelidae

    DelFelidae
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    Frankly, I blame your friend! Take note, I'm very anti social and can come off as a bit cold, but I'd be VERY upset with this so-called "Friend." What the hell was she up to?! Although, she probably didn't mean any harm...But it still wasn't her business. I'd just try to ignore her, you don't want to make things worse by causing a scene between you two. Especially as you seem to be in the same social group. But, do not share intimate information with her anymore, or people who might tell her.
     
    #6 DelFelidae, May 23, 2013
  7. FruitFly

    FruitFly
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    Other than live your life and let the emotions settle, nothing. If you're seriously concerned about your mental well being then you need to talk to someone who can genuinely help you; a teacher, school counselor, a parent, your doctor. Talk to them about your concerns, about how you feel about the boy in question, about how these feelings are making your feel. This forum will only do so much, and for this sort of thing I personally feel the best advice that anyone can give is to talk to someone in your life who you trust enough to discuss these issues with them.

    We, as a forum, can only do so much and what we can do is very limited. If you want all of these feelings to stop, if you want to get over them, you have to either ride them out or start talking to a trusted adult in your life who you will listen to, or even just someone who'll listen to you. You have a lot of feelings, strong feelings, for this boy and it is evident in your posts that these are not going away anytime soon. However we, as a forum, do not actually know you and cannot give you the tailored advice you perhaps require given the intensity of your feelings. What is it you want advice about, specifically? Feelings have to be worked through, most people cannot turn them on/off at will and it takes time for intense feelings to be worked through. It can be a slow, painful process especially if you never seek resolution in terms of finding out how responsive the object of your desire would be to your feelings; until you do that, or until you work through your feelings, they will simply build in intensity as you go between a lot of what if scenarios and thoughts about whether or not he is or is not gay.

    I'll be honest, the majority of sisters who are perhaps not exposed to the LGBTQ+ community in their home life, after being told such two conflicting stories, would turn around and tell someone to fuck off as their brother is not gay. I wouldn't necessarily equate that with being a bitch, just with being a sister who is quite possibly concerned about her brother. I'm sure there are other instances which make you feel that she deserves being called a bitch, and maybe she does, but I'd pin most of it on the fact that some people do react in that way when faced with something they may not view in an entirely positive light.
     
    #7 FruitFly, May 23, 2013
    Last edited: May 23, 2013
  8. Femmeme

    Femmeme
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    (*hug*)

    Ok, deep breaths sugar.

    Realistically speaking his sister probably has no real clue as to whether he's straight or not yet. What happened is she got her ego bruised and now she's lashing out.

    Her words change nothing, and getting along with your date's sibling really isn't even remotely important.

    Still you do need to prepair for the possiblity that you're crush won't be interested in you and figure out what you're going to focus on if that happens.

    Part of me wonders if you focus on the crush to help take you're mind off everything else you're dealing with. Find an adult or counselor or someone to talk to about what you're going through.
     
    #8 Femmeme, May 23, 2013
  9. clarkec1

    clarkec1 Guest

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    Thanks Femmeme, that has really assured me that even though his sister said he's not gay, she could be wrong. I think I'm going to talk to my form tutor, either that or I need to talk to him. I think the only way to get this over with is to approach him, even if I don't think the time is right.
     
    #9 clarkec1, May 23, 2013
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