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Coming out to family- should it be private?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by fuzzyfeet, May 26, 2013.

  1. fuzzyfeet

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    Ok wow, I haven't been on this for about 3 months but I feel like I need to ask some outside opinions for help and advice and I know this is a great place to get that.

    So here's my problem. I'm not out to my immediate family (parents, siblings). And I was thinking of doing it in a few weeks during my brother's graduation dinner...
    BUT. First of all, do you think it would kind of be rude and selfish of me to do it on his important day and kind of take away from the whole thing?
    Two, there's going to be another family there with us (his girlfriend's family). Is it terrible of me to break the news not only in a public space (restaurant) but in front of another family? Is it awkward for them to have to sit through whatever conversation follows?

    With all that said, it would just be a good time I think to do it because first of all, the whole family's together. Second, I could do a toast or something and then casually pull a "oh congratulations and now that you've graduated, there's something I feel like I should tell you all..." Right?

    ANY opinions and thoughts would be greatly appreciated. THANK YOU!
     
  2. Bobbybobby99

    Bobbybobby99 Guest

    Eh, good a time as any. Make sure not to make the whole thing about you, but it should work. Good luck :slight_smile:
     
  3. SimpleMan

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    I would say to definitely wait for another time.

    It is his special day to honor all the work he has put in thus far in school. Even if he was cool with you being a lesbian, it could look like you were trying to take the attention away from him. If anyone takes it badly it could also turn what would have been a happy memory for him into a bad one. Lastly, I don't think it would be a good idea to come out with his girlfriend's family there at the same time. That puts your parents and brother in a position where they have to wrestle with how they feel about your sexuality in front of polite company. You should give them a private time and space so they can process the information before they have to discuss it with others outside the family.
     
  4. fuzzyfeet

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    Hmmm yeah that's kind of what I was thinking...I guess the cons probably outweigh the pros in this situation
     
  5. Fire2free

    Fire2free Guest

    I'd wait it needs to be said in confidence.
     
  6. DelFelidae

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    Yeah, I'd wait until another time. I'd not want to distract from my brother and I definitely would not want to come out his girlfriends family at the same time.