I'm becoming a pro at friend-zoning myself on first dates (BAD THING!)

When you meet a guy you like/have a lot in common with do you end the date with some agreement to meet again and do something else that you'd both enjoy? Perhaps figure out some progression of these that lets you do fun things together, maybe some of these let you talk and get to know each other better, etc. At some point you may (if things are proceeding nicely) arrange to do some activities that include the possibility of more intimate activities and sex. How fast all this goes is presumably up to the two of you figuring it out as you go.

How fast all this goes is presumably driven by the both of you and how fast you want it to go.

Just some thoughts,

Todd

 

Usually when things end up on a couch or bed the likelihood of that tends to increase dramatically, and its not too difficult to fit in.

"hey you want to go watch tv in my bedroom/ on the comfy sofa (if you have a comfy sofa/loveseat?)


Let's just say I'm having a horrible time because I'm having the exact opposite of your problem, because ^^^ keeps on happening

 

wow I've never heard of that. Men are such whores it's hard to imagine being friendzoned by one. My advice: make yourself sexier, they can't friendzone you if they can't resist you. Flirt a little, show that you're a sexual being and that you want them (without going overboard.) That's what 'em boys like.

 

Well, a laid-back mentality does not necessarily have to be a bad thing. It's how pretty much all of my friends ended up dating people: hanging out as "cool friends" first, and discovering there was potential for more a bit later. I was perfectly happy being just friends with a guy for months before both of us figured out we were massively crushing on each other.

Though, in all of those cases, I guess there was always a slight push towards doing stuff together. Much like how you and your bro friends probably don't rely on just randomly running into each other, you might benefit from making a definite proposal to hang out more. It's all too easy to go

"We should hang out together again!"
"Yeah, we should"

Because nothing comes from that. It's an agreement of principle, not a date. If you want to meet them again, you should probably be more direct, and propose a place and time. Preferably to engage in one of the joint interests.

Generally, I'm not a fan of hinting at sex or flirting, unless it's what you want to do. I really don't believe there's such a thing as a "friendzone" to be studiously avoided by flirting in exactly the right way. Just being proactive about meeting up should be a good start, and playing it by ear from there.

 

So so very true, but in my case it was watching t.v. on their bed. I should have known what was about to happen...:icon_redf