Okay, so over the last Summer I did some pretty dumb things. Let's start at the beginning. So in February, I met this one guy (we'll call him B). He came out to a gaming community I was on as gay (he later said he was bi), and me, already out to them, I helped him out with any problems he had and things like that. We talked more and more leading up to about June or so. I realized that I had a crush on him, (he was 13, I was 15, but I'm 3 years older than him still.). I was going to tell him about my crush on him, but he had to go to China to see one of his sick relatives, so I crushed over B for an entire month, even though he wasn't there. I would sometimes get so sick of not talking to him I would cry and go into fits. It probably didn't help that one of my friends (also from the gaming comm.) went suicidal over the summer, and I had to help her out. So July comes and one night B comes back from China, and apparently someone got to tell him before I did, because he friendzoned me that night. I was crushed, but I thought that I could beat the friendzone, and win him over. August comes and I write him a letter on Skype, professing how much I like him and that I wanted him to like me back. He rejects me, and promptly after, he starts leaving the community. I was devastated that not only I didn't get him, I also lost B as a friend. I did some stupid things as well, like cutting myself once, but I realized that I should not be doing that so I stopped. I can honestly say I wasn't over B until February of this year. He had been gone for a few months and I was hoping to move on. Then, he comes back to the community. I talk to him for a little bit and ask him if I creeped him out or something, he says that I didn't creep him out and that we could still be friends. At this point I am fine about being just friends. But the next day he accuses me of sending logs of us talking to my best friend M. I only said I had been talking to him to her. He also said that he wasn't ready for a relationship a few weeks ago when we were talking, and lo and behold, he was talking to my BEST FRIEND M in that kind of way, and had given her his phone number. After he accuses me of that he unadds me off of Skype, and at this point I don't even care about him anymore, he's gone and I know it. The problem is he is still in our community group chat on Skype, and I can be in there, talking to all my friends, in a call with them even, and then he comes in and I either leave the conversation or the call, because I feel it would be too awkward to talk. I know I did this all to myself, and that I probably deserve all of this. I just want to be able to be in a conversation with him without feeling so awkward, but I have no clue how to do it. Any suggestions would be helpful. :bang:
At the risk of sounding a bit blase here, the best advice I think I can given here is "learn to deal with it". Not just because I think it'll be best for this situation, but because it's probably a life lesson that will serve you well down the road. Let's sum up the situation as it stands now. He's not interested in you. He's interested in your best friend. Your best friend apparently is interested in him as well. That's painful, but it happens, and they're allowed to make a go of it. So inwardly, wish them well. And when either or both shows up on Skype, don't run off. Stick around. Just treat them like everybody else. Don't bring up the fumbled attempts at a relationship, or what's happening between them now. If either of them bring up the former, be simple and honest about it. "Yeah, I was sort of besotten with B for awhile. Sorry if I was so clumsy about it." If they bring up the latter, say "Well, it's not how I wanted it play out, but I hope it works out for you two." End of story. Lex
