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Oh no! I Love my Friend!

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by clarkec1, May 31, 2013.

  1. clarkec1

    clarkec1 Guest

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    Yes it's another one of those threads. I apologize in advance for any boredom this thread may bring to you.

    Me and this friend are quite close to each other; we walk to school together, walk home together, and generally enjoy each other's company and like each other - as friends. I am definitely not as close to him as I am with my best friend, and I would say he is either my 2nd or 3rd closest friend. Before I continue I would like to say that I do not like by best friend or any of my other friends for more than friendship.

    I have only just realized that I have got a small attraction for him, well, today. Last night I had a dream bout him. Let's just say that it was a er... intimate dream. No not like that, but he kind of erm, well, showed me his... not properly showed me but nearly. You get the point. But that isn't the only time I thought I had something for him. If you have read my very recent thread "Do you like to Touch your Friends?" you will know that I sort of like coming into contact with my friends. But with this friend, I like it... more. I don't know why I do, but I also like his appearance (sorry if that's judgemental, and I agree that appearance is not everything in a relationship; far from it) and his personality. He's so warm and talkative and is quite caring and supportive.

    As far as I know he's straight. I mean he hasn't said he's gay, and he hasn't said he's straight, but I know that you don't just go up to someone and say "Hi, I'm straight". That's quite funny when you think about it. Anyway, he has been giving slight subtle gestures that may represent he is either gay, or gay and interested in me. These hints have only been happening since I came out, so I think he may be more comfortable to come out because he knows I'm out; hence the hints. What he does is that he walks closer to me than usual now, sometimes even walking touching me; he wanted to get my attention and he touched my shoulder for a longer time that you would expect, he also generally acted stereotypically (I don't like to judge off them though) gay. They could mean nothing but I want to be sure.

    The thing is, if he does like me and I like him (I don't know yet), we simply can't go out. We have been friends for about 2 years, and I wouldn't things to change drastically. And other people at school would be very very surprised. And also what about my crush (I don't really want to bring him into it), I still like him a lot and am in no way doubting that we will get together, and am still trying to talk to him.

    I don't really know what I want to do. I like him so much as a friend, but now also more than friends - I think.

    Sorry for another "I think I like my Friend" thread, but I need some advice on where to go from now.

    Thanks in Advance for any guidance you could can give!
     
    #1 clarkec1, May 31, 2013
    Last edited: May 31, 2013
  2. tryhtwfr

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    This could be true, he may feel more comfortable and whatnot if his close friend did come out influencing him that being Gay is fine.

    OK. One thing you need to understand is, even with your crush, that if someone walks closer to you or brushes past you whilst coming into contact with you doesn't necessarily mean they are gay or like you. In your case, if it's a corridor then it will most definitely be tight or small; I may be wrong. Like when I go to Central London, I come into contact with many strangers when walking but it doesn't mean they like me and are hinting it.


    What stereotypical acts in particular have you noticed?


    Remember the 'IF' - a conditional. If you don't want to go out, then you can try suppressing these feelings or talk to him about it openly and get everything out there.


    Let me give you an ultimatum. If you had to choose between your crush or your best friend, which one would you choose?
     
  3. clarkec1

    clarkec1 Guest

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    My crush or my best friend? My crush. This isn't my best friend I'm talking about in this thread though, he is my 2nd or 3rd best friend. I wouldn't go out with my best friend because our friendship is unique, and well I just don't feel attracted to him in that way. And for this friend I'm talking about, I would still choose my crush.

    Stereotypically gay things that he did were acting jumpy if you know what I mean. And he sort of did that thing with his hands.