Helllllllo This is my fist time posting, and I appreciate all responses! :lol: I just came out a year ago this month and as soon as I did I went straight into a relationship...I'm 26 and I've had my own few gay experiences and I've been in one gay relationship prior to coming out, when i was 17. However, today, my boyfriend will tell me about his different experiences, sexual or not, and its not like I'm jealous because he has been places I haven't been in the gay culture, i.e. relationships, bars, clubs, socializing, cruising... and ya i know pretty sad, i haven't even been to the club yet lol...but i want my own experiences. Now don't get me wrong, our relationship is amazing. AMAZING, perfect! And I'm very happy in it, but I have these thoughts about what life would be like if I had come out sooner. I don't harp on that, but lately it's something I've thought about a lot. My boyfriend came out when he was much younger and has experienced life as a gay man from the time he was 15. I know I can't go back and change the past, duh, however I want to have my own experiences, not all sexual either. I don't have a network of gay friends yet and when I say friends, I mean just friends haha! This I think has a lot to do with how I'm feeling as well. I think i might just need a social outlet? I've started working out again at the gym, which definitely makes me feel better! I've been out of college for a year, and I know when I go back Ill be able to network, but for now I'm still in that phase of finding pride in who I am and finding myself, my identity as a gay man. Sorry for blabbering and being scatter brained. Now it's time to try and sleeeeep! :sleep: Thanks for reading and your responses! Nighty night !
I'm in a similar boat. I'm in my mid 30s and my boy friend is in his late 20s. He came out in college (about 10 years ago) and I just came out about 6 months ago and immediately started dating him. Sometimes I get envious of the fact that he was able to come out earlier than I and be who he really was. Sometimes I feel that I wasted those years when I was trying to be straight. However, it took me those years to finally get to a place where I could be honest with myself and come out. So I am glad for that! Like you, my relationship with my boy friend is amazing and so I don't regret the past because I feel it was necessary for me to go through it in order to be in a place where I could date when I met my boy friend. For me, it's been important to try and find my own friends who are gay. I like all of his friends that I have met, but I feel that I need my own network as well. It's hard, but I have been trying and have had some success.
Other than going to the club where do you go to meet other gays and befriend them? I sometimes get so caught up with the "sexual" label in the gay culture that I think how am I supposed to meet friends without them thinkin it's more than that? But I'm sure it's gonna happen and ill just make it clear i am in a relationship. I love my boyfriends friends that I have met but I haven't really met any of his gay friends. I think im still trying to get comfortable in my new skin, as we get accustomed to that straight lifestyle, its hard to shed that old me. I know some identity searching has to happen... oh ya i didnt want it to look like im dating a 15 year old haha! We're both 26 years old ...
