By now yes I've made a few threads about my friend. And yes I still strongly feel he has mutual feelings for me. But lately his behavior has been a real mind fuck. He will do things like call me beautiful and talk in hearts and just real flirty. To the point where if I show another friend what he's saying she agrees its very flirtatious. However, this is then followed up by him avoiding me at all costs. Then it's back to straight talk and then the flirting happens....repeat cycle. Like even today, I saw him driving and I knew he saw me. He purposely stayed a couple car lengths back as to not be seen, but once he saw I noticed him, he drove up beside me and talked like usual. This is a day after I texted him saying we need to sort our friendship out. Of course that discussion still hasn't happened, he acted like I never sent the text. I even brought up where he is now deleting stuff I've tagged him in on FB, stuff that initially he was mad at me cause I didn't include him in it. Like I said, I think he's real confused and therefore why we r best friends one day, and complete strangers the next day. It's at the point where I need to back off or I'm going to go insane, if I'm not already there. He knows I'm bi and he knows I like him, that's not the issue. My question is, if he confronts me on why I've stopped talking to him and have basically backed off do I tell him the truth? Do I tell him his behavior is very confusing to someone who he knows likes him? Like I said, he'll call me beautiful. Tell me he wants to run his hands through my hair, talk in all kinds of hearts etc. basically my two friends I confide on about this say I'm his emotional bf at the moment. Or does the fact I'm strongly certain he has mutual feelings that he's running from at the moment make it a touchy subject for me to say he is confusing me with his behavior. I don't want to force him in a corner on his own sexuality, but his confusing, hot and cold behavior is really screwing with my emotions big time. And I can't go on like this. Something has to give.?
I think you should most definitely distant yourself from him. And once he realizes it, just ignore him and his advances. There's nothing more annoying than someone who's playing you hot and cold. I'm sure he's probably having trouble with his feelings, so I'd stay away from him until he sorts his feelings out. If he asks you why you're ignoring him then be honest with him.
Yah, like I'm practically convinced he is confused with his feelings and that he likes me. There are so many signs for it to just be a coincidence, but at the damn time it's too frustrating for me to deal with anymore. It's ruining me as a person.
You shouldn't let it ruin you, as you say. You're better than that. And I'm not criticizing. I have obsessed over different people in my life and it's very paralyzing, but these came and went, though I thought they never would when going through them. I would suggest keeping a healthy distance, but still keep the friendship. Find a way to tune out the texts and the FB antics, and not try to analyze him. That's harder when you yourself have an interest. Are there other people who could take away that level of interest, from him, at this time, or is this currently the male upon who your attention is focused? My problem was a little different. I had these "from afar" infatuations and the longer I kept my distance, the more confused I became. What did I do? I broke the silence and became an acquaintance or got onto speaking terms with people who intrigued me as quickly as possible, and that took a lot of the mystique away. What a great strategy to ease the odd feelings.
Unfortunately we are about to become roommates so distance is going to be hard. And he is the person I think of all the time. I've gotta sort this out now before it ends in disaster, cause waiting for him to sort himself out could be years, if ever. I don't have it in me to deal with that.
Can you find ANOTHER roommate? Living together could be a roller coaster. Really, only you know yourself and him well enough to figure how that would go down (no pun intended).
No. We will be good roommates I think. I've decided to back off and put the ball in his court. If he confronts me on why I've went quiet I'm going to tell him exactly why. That his behavior is very confusing so either he is messing with my head, or he isn't as serious about this friendship as he lets on at times or that there is in fact something about our friendship that confuses him that he's running from. At this point, I honestly don't know how else to deal with it. I've been putting up with his roller coaster act for a year now and it's driving me to a straight jacket. I can't keep putting myself through this. At some point he has to realize his running from himself (whether its his sexuality or something else) is going to cost him friendships and happiness. He can't keep getting babied. I hate saying that, but its true.
