Hi! So, I have a friend that I've become very close to this year. She's about my age and at my maturity level. Throughout this past year, she's been dropping a lot of "hints" that she may be gay - things that don't always make sense and seem forced because she wants me to know something. For example, she's said things to me like: "I love homosexuals!" "_(insert name here)_ is probably gay - isn't that so cute!" and many more... She also points out a lot of girls that she finds attractive (this is pretty normal for any girl but she does it A LOT). In addition, she fights adamantly for gay rights. So, with all of this, I kind of assume that she's gay... BUT - she has had way too many boyfriends for someone our age and always points out cute guys that she's "going to marry they just don't know it yet". About a month ago, she asked a guy at our school out and was absolutely crushed when he rejected her. So, I'm confused. I don't need to label her and her sexual orientation won't change how I think of her as a person, but if I know she's probably not be heterosexual then I might want to come out to her as someone to support me. Does it sound like she's gay or bi? Would you suggest I talk to her about my struggle with identifying my sexual orientation? Thank you so much!
I wouldn't really say she's lesbian. Her being bisexual is a possibility, though. She actually just sounds like a huge supporter of LGBT rights. If you're comfortable to confront and trust her with your sexual orientation issues, then I don't see why you couldn't talk to her about it!
It wouldn't hurt to ask her directly, since she seems pretty flexible about gay rights. Though, since you said she mentions it a lot, then the next time she brings something related to homosexuality up again, immediately ask her if she's gay/bisexual "or something" - just try not to sound so serious when asking her, you still wanna keep it cool as friends. She seems pretty open-minded.
If she's 12, 13, or 14, that is very young to know about one's sexuality, in all honesty. Perhaps she is, but perhaps we will not know until she grows older. I think she'd be a supportive friend to talk to about your sexuality, regardless =)
Thanks you guys! I do think that next time she brings up something related to homosexuality, I will talk to her about it. She is a SUPER open-minded person. Thanks again for all of your wonderful advice! I really appreciate it.
Maybe she suspects that you are bi/lesbian so she is trying to reassure you that she will accept you. This all depends on how close you are. Just a thought.