Sorry for my bad English. I hope you can understand whatever i will tell here. And sorry the text is a little bit too long It is all about Sammyboy I think i have a crush on this guy. We both live in Zurich Switzerland. 2-3 Months ago I went for a lecture from two designers to a gallery. I was smoking outside and i saw someone is coming into the gallery. When I was inside then i wished he should sit down next to me. After a few minutes he did it I was so exited and breathed so deeply and a little bit loud like a teenager with a friend in the same bed. You know probably this thing what i mean. After the lecture was finished i saw he talked to guys from my class from the university. After two days i asked my classmates who he was. They told me they live together in a student house. In the same day I send him a post card with one of my classmate. I have just written how excited I was and that I really liked him. After a few days he sent me an email and it was friendly but really short. He has written he was really pleased for my post card but he is straight and its not really the best idea to meet each other for a beer. etc. I sent him a nice answer and this time the was how he writes really different. His second email was really nice, lovely but with the same end. Till 2-3 Weeks we have some emails. I and he were every time really kind, friendly, lovely in our emails. In My emails I have chosen my words really nicely. I told him, nothing must be happen between us. the feeling that I can have a crush, like/love someone very much is a wonderful beautiful feeling. It happens so seldom that i like another man. I told him nothing must be happen but it would make me really happy to meet him and spend a few hours and it must mean nothing. just friendly like to nice kind men. He told me we can see each other in the vernissage from my degree/diploma exhibition and if we get along well together then we can go to drink somethin together on another day. I have written an email again and told him that i am really shy and in this kind of situations i don`t talk much if I am somewhere where lots of other people too. I don`t like small talks. I told him we are two nice, kind men and there is no reason that we can not get along well together and i said him, he should do that for me because he can`t really know and meet the real me in the exhibition. The funny thing i could not really remember his face how he looks and it was impossible he can know how I look. 2 Weeks ago he has written to me an email again and told me we can meet on mon, tue, or thur. I asked him we can have a nice dinner and we meet at 28. Mai for first time in a very nice restaurant. I went there an half hour ago and wanted to calm down, i was so exited. I was smoking in smoking room and had a drink. after 20 minutes he came in, suddenly he stand in front of me. He hugged me really warm lovely. we started to talk to each other. I was so exited i needed 10-20 minutes. We had 2 drink and smoked together in this room. After a while they asked us if we would like to have our dinner in this room. We said yes and we had a private dining room, just for us. they brought our foods after each other and closed the door. We meet there at 7 pm and we stayed till 12 pm. and walked a little bit to the bus stop, hugged each other and everyone went to his own home. and then it was the vernissage at 31 May. We meet there in my school to for a short time and at the second June we went to holiday and he is stil in holiday in some other countries, will come back next week. he send a sms a few minutes ago. The thing is he is probably a very very lovely kind nice person, a human.I dont know him really much. This is the reason why we meet. If he were gay than he did not write he is straight in his first email. I am a rational person i don`t ask myself what everything can mean. like my some friends i don`t try to find out impossible meaning what can probably be not true. It doesn`t have to mean maybe he is 10% gay, bisexual because he is very lovely to me, we meet and spent 6 hours at our dinner. that must not mean something special. Yes I know everyone is able to do lots of thing or different sexual experiences in his life. and gay or not lots of people did some homosexual experiences in their childhood or puberty or later. sometimes a hole is just a hole nobody thinks what should it mean and they just do something etc. We are still in contact and after his holiday we will meet soon again. He has soon some examinations. And because I am so rational i try not to think of him to much and to fall really in love with him. MY QUESTION is. now i could be a little bit irrational. Has someone ever made an experience like that? Is that possible that a straight gay can fall in live in a gay man? I think our connection is just friendly. We could have a nice friendship in the near future but can it be more? I gay a gay friend and he told me his boyfriend fell suddenly in love with him but he was a straight gay before that. Maybe you can tell me your own stories of give me some tips/advices. Thank you very much in advance.
It really honestly depends, sexual orientation and romantic orientation are different; I consider my self at this point a person who is emotionally attracted to women but not really sexually attracted to anyone. But it depends on if he is; in my opinion, it'd be best to look somewhere else and not deal with the pressure.
Well, I know of friends that eventually ended up in bed, but it always ended bad. And then you have lost a nice friend too. A dinner over many hours doesn´t say a thing about romance, friends have that. You didn´t know eachother well, so there was plenty to find out and to talk about and then time flies. Cherish the friendship. Don´t hope or wish for more. As long as you like this guy in a romatic way you are not open to compatable gay guys. So you might miss out on "the one" just beacuse you dream of a guy you can´t have.
I see a lot of possibilities, but nothing definite. Maybe he just thinks you're a great guy. Maybe he's intrigued by you. Maybe he's besotten with you. Really tough to say. You laid out your boundaries at the outset. Nothing must happen. Is that a boundary you want to stick to? Because I'm sensing that perhaps you don't. Lex
sigh I wish. It would be easier if everyone was just bisexual ahaha. But ask yourself this question- do you see yourself falling in love with a girl?
