I had 2 dates with a girl and really like her. But nothing happened, not even a kiss! I've never kissed a girl before so I was hoping she'd make a move, but it was only when she had walked me back to the train station that she strongly hinted she wanted me to make a move, but by that time I proper freaked out because there were so many people around etc and I'm still new to this. I still really hoped that she'd try to kiss me or something but she didn't. I got on the train thinking I'd effed up, and she didn't text me back after that. I later met someone else online and have arranged to meet this weekend. She is really nice and will be travelling white a way to see me, but I'm not sure there is a spark. I know it's hard to know this without meeting up, but even online there's no flirting etc and it feels more like a friendship. I'm worried I just arranged to meet her because I'm still feeling down about the first girl, and when the first girl sent me a casual text recently (not asking to meet or anything), I still felt butterflies. Should I cancel my date with the new girl or give it a chance?
I would say that in matters of the heart, there is no substitute for meeting someone face-to-face. The written word is mediated, you are working only with symbols on a screen. No matter how much you try, you will never get to the essence of that person without at least meeting her. I would recommend not cancelling the date, but a date is just that, it doesn't mean a relationship has to develop, you are just meeting to get a clearer idea of who this person is.
Thanks, I guess you're right. It's just that she's coming quite a long way to see me and I feel guilty if my heart's not really in it. But as you said, I might feel different after meeting her.
I'd say go on the date, and who knows what might happen? It might just be mundane and you get nothing out of it, but there's nothing to lose, right? I understand feeling bad about her travelling a way to come and meet you, but she made that decision and if you end up not liking her, then that's just too bad. As for the first girl, if you feel that spark, maybe try carrying on texting but be quite flirty? Maybe she finds it hard to take the initiative too? I dunno, just some suggestions. I hope stuff works out for you!
