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I've told my friend I love him, what now?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by veronicaslolita, Jun 19, 2013.

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  1. veronicaslolita

    veronicaslolita
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    I'm 17, male and bisexual. I have been suffering from depression in the last 9 months. I have developed extremely strong feelings for my friend. I didn't really think it was love, but I'm confident that those feelings have grown into love. However, he is straight and in a relationship with my best friend. It got me real depressed. I decided I had enough last week and came out and told them the situation. They (my friend and my best friend/his girlfriend) were both fine with it, and want to help me overcome this, since it's been affecting me.

    However, where do we go from here? I don't want to lose him as a friend, as he just a great guy friend wise and I'd really miss out on the opportunity to not continue to be friends anymore. I said he doesn't want me to go either since we get on really well, it's annoying that my emotions have got in the way. Of course, is there anyway to get rid of these feelings without leaving my friends (since he hangs around with my other friends)?

    I understand space helps, but I just find that I pester him with messages or whatever and he doesn't want me to leave either, so taking time away from him won't work that well I think under these circumstances.
     
    #1 veronicaslolita, Jun 19, 2013
  2. Corradino

    Corradino
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    Hi veronicaslolia, Firstly well done for your courage in confronting the situation and telling your friends. That must have been immensely difficult, especially in the light of your recent depression.

    Ok...now where to go from here. Keep both of them as friends, they sound awesome. They have accepted the situation and believe in you, that's very special. It's really down to you controlling your emotions, you've got to accept he's straight and you can't have him...but your friendship will remain strong. I'd recommend linking with them and asking them to help you come out to others.
     
    #2 Corradino, Jun 19, 2013
  3. Linthras

    Linthras Guest

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    I'm just going to explain what love means to me, it could be very different for you.
    But for me being in love means wanting that special person to be as happy as can be.
    Which means that if they love someone else, I'd be happy for them and fully support them.
    Sure it would hurt that he/she didn't love me, but I'd still want to see them happy.
    Maybe you can try and look at the situation that way?

    Eitherway kudos for telling the truth!
     
    #3 Linthras, Jun 19, 2013
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