how to break up w\ gf and not ruin our friendship?

The short term answer, to be blunt, is that you can't.

Long-term...well, it's possible, and it has happened before. But keep in mind, no matter how you frame it, it's nearly impossible for a break-up to come across as anything other than a rejection. And don't forget that the important elements include not only that you want to remain friends, but also whether she wants to remain friends. Put it all together, and "you're not good enough for me, but want to be friends?" makes for one bizarre statement.

That's not to say you can't continue being supportive of someone post-breakup (and perhaps the most important part of maintaining some kind of connection is what you do after the breakup), but that will often involve some distance and not the kind of support a person's likely to get from other friends or family.

For now, though, if the relationship isn't working out like you would hope, you have the right to leave it, and you don't need to feel bad about that. Just be respectful and leave it up to her - that's about all you can do, I think.

 

I think, its best to keep a distance after you break up for your sake and her's.
I stayed friends with my ex....and it nearly killed me and One day, she told me about this guy she met who melts her heart ..whatever and I just left, i couldn't deal with that.

Its best to keep a distance but nobody said it was easy.
I wanted to stop talking to her because we were just friends and I had feelings for her.
I wrote something while I was still talking to her. It doesn't relate at all to your situation but It just shows ...Staying friends isn't easy at all. It nearly killed me but you can still be there for her as gravity said. You can still support her and be there for her when she needs you/

I know its stupid but I thought i would share

Once again my mind seems to trick me
just when i think, i have moved on
My heart is like "Nope"
but my brain is telling me what to do but i refuse

I don't want to do this
it's not going to work, i just know it won't
a cycle, i keep going through
A way out that may not even work

I don't know what to do anymore
i should leave her but i just don't want to
sometimes we got to do what we don't want
but how is this going to help?

All this pain surges through my body and i can't take it
but i began to suffer more and more
waiting for someone to come along
wishing and hoping to get out of this cycle