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My dad has convinced me that I am messed up for being gay...

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by vhrebels, Jul 2, 2013.

  1. vhrebels

    vhrebels Guest

    Hey. So, me and my dad were talking in the car about if gay marriage should be legal. I said that the original Hebrew bible didn't say anything about committed homosexual relationships. He believed me, but then he explained to me that every time the bible talks about marriage, it is between a man and a woman. Any other sexual activity outside of marriage is sinful, therefore, homosexual acts are sinful. I've heard this before from other people, but hearing this from my dad just made me feel absolutely terrible. I used to accept my sexuality and I informally came out to one friend and several other people think I am, but I feel so depressed now. My parents think that my future relationships are inherently sinful and wrong. I don't think I can ever come out to them. One of the problems is that I'm starting to believe what they're saying. The bible is clear about what it says on homosexual marriage, and I feel so inedequate in the eyes of God and my parents. Another thing is, although a few people know I'm gay, I don't really feel comfortable saying these things, because they are religious. The only person that I have directly come out to I have a huge crush on, and I think he's a bit gay, because about a week ago, he slept with me in his hammock while we were camping for no reason at all. We both seemed to enjoy it, but the reason that I can't talk about why I think what I'm doing is wrong, is becuase he's a religious Catholic, and he thinks that what he's doing is sinful too, so I don't want to make him feel bad or anything. I thought that we might be able to actually get in a relationship, but now my dad has convinced me that I am a sick person. Sorry for the really long post, but it was hard to explain what all is happening right now.
     
  2. greatwhale

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    I know what you are feeling, but you are here to find out otherwise.

    The prohibition against "a man lying as with a woman" is part of Leviticus, and is part of the categories of ritual sin. The argument that can be made here is that you and I are not that kind of homosexual (in our case, it is not a ritualistic act), we simply do not fit that category. In that respect, the Bible is silent, and as you yourself pointed out, it is also silent on committed homosexual relationships.

    Of course, you can argue this with the "believers" till you're blue in the face and you won't get anywhere, but I am telling you this so that you, yourself, at least, can think a little differently about you; that you are what you are, as God has made you, and there is nothing sick about that.
     
  3. resu

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    The Bible is not the be all and end all of your life, and it says nothing about gay marriage. Now matter what your parents tell you, there is nothing wrong with you being gay. If you've heard of Maslow's heirarchy of needs, you'll see that sex is one of the basic needs for most people, and repression of the sexual urge can lead to very negative psychological consequences.

    Here's an interesting article on the idea of "biblical marriage"
    Biblical Marriage Not Defined Simply As One Man, One Woman: Iowa Religious Scholars' Op-Ed
     
  4. Boricua

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    Well I wanna start off by saying that being who you are doesn't make you a sick person, and try not to worry about the whole "sexual activity outside of marriage" because I'm pretty sure everyone breaks that one. As for the homosexuality being a sin, excuse me if I'm wrong but aren't there many things in the bible says are wrong but people choose to ignore (ex: eating shrimp,getting piercings and tattoos) I'm sorry if I'm not much help its just that I don't really care if my parents are ok with me being gay or not so I can't relate plus I'm not very religious. But yea just remember that you are not sick and there are many people that agree
     
  5. Linthras

    Linthras Guest

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    The funny thing with Leviticus is that it also prohibits eating shellfish, wearing nylon and several other silly things.
    So people who argue on the basis of Leviticus should burn most of their clothes and never eat any shellfish. Yet most violate at least one if not both of those rules.

    ---------- Post added 3rd Jul 2013 at 09:33 AM ----------

    Also these are some examples of Biblical marriages:
    [​IMG]
     
  6. srslywtf

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    Even if you want to believe the bible was originally the word of god,
    there is no way that the bible we have today has survived unaltered. Bits have been removed, bits have been added, bits have been mistranslated, bits have been deliberately changed to serve a purpose.

    One may not be able to prove that god exists/doesnt exist, but it's pretty easy to prove that the bible
    A) Has been altered by humans with bias/agendas.

    B) makes statements that do not match other statements in the bible.

    And let's not get into "which" bible is the right one....

    If God made all humans, then he made all lgbt humans. He made them with the ability to sin. Not just the ability, but they were born that way. Why would an all-knowing all-powerful all-loving being do that? If he is 'testing' people.. why? Is he jealous of people that dont follow his rules? Is he too dumb to make a brain that obeys his rules? Or is he a sadist?
     
    #6 srslywtf, Jul 3, 2013
    Last edited: Jul 3, 2013
  7. Chip

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    Go on Youtube and google Matthew Vines, then watch his one-hour presentation on homosexuality and the Bible. He's a gay Christian who has spent several years doing deep biblical scholarship on gays and marriage and the Bible... and his interpretations have created a huge ripple in the Christian community, with a lot of high-up bishops and clergy changing their viewpoint as a result of his very reasoned, sensible approach.

    I think this will go a long way toward helping you feel more confident in your own beliefs.

    I also suggest watching "Prayers for Bobby" and "For the Bible Tells Me So", both excellent films dealing with this issue.
     
  8. djone12

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    furst im gay and very religes lovidicus is old testoment and wen jesus died on the cross it is sed that all old testoment laws r abolised and in the new tesoment paul sees thes acts as gross and unholy but it ses that the peapl were rapeing slaves both homo and hedrosexuls were doing it and that is what he is talking about when also the bible ses that love can come in all forms so isent homosexul love a form but rape and other premarige sex sins r born from greed and lust as crists followers thow u r forgiven of all sins past present and futer just beleave that jesus died on the cross for u to hace ever lasting life so comited homosexul relashon ships ar not a sin but if the goverment makes it illegal than it will be becas the bible also ses follow the laws of the land
     
  9. Straight ally

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    Well, i have the theory that the bible:

    1-shouldnt be taken literaly in many segments

    2- everything is connected with the rest of the bible, so you have to read it as a whole and comparing. I dont know what is like to reqd only the old testament as im a christian (i assuming you are jew), so i have the new testament and i believe in christ. But lets say that there are many part of new testament that let me believe in the bible and that homosexuality is ok at the same time, i dont know, maybe if you read the old testament as a whole the same you would conclude the same.

    3- dont use the bible to defend homosexuality, i mean, how can be bad to love people of your same gender or having sex with them , that doesnt hurt anybody, people hurt themselves with their hate. Instead of defending homosexuality with the bible, know that being gay is ok and defend the bible with what you think is right.... What do i mean? Hold on to the bible, analyze it try to see how it actually fits with truth, but if one day you conclude that the bible is just a book that is wrong then let it go, donthold to it... By the way im not saying you should be and atheist, as you can believe in god without an specific religion, you can be just purely monotheistic and believe in god.
     
  10. KyleD

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    Thanks for this. I am going to watch his videos.

     
  11. carfan92

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    if god didn't want gays and lesbians, he wouldn't of created them in several species besides humans. Studies have shown that it's something that people are born with.

    stay strong and stay true to yourself, if your parents love you, they will support you regardless of your sexual orientation.
     
  12. mpl

    mpl
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    Hope it`ll help you:
     
    #12 mpl, Jul 10, 2013
    Last edited: Jul 10, 2013
  13. mattygirl

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    I worry about coming out to my parents because of this reason. I saved that marriage image to my moms laptop to show her when I come out.